Sorting Kelechi out/ Edith Ohaja
 Janet wondered what the racket coming from her house was all about. But as she got closer, she discovered it was more of the usual. Her teenage twins - Kelechi and Tochi - were going at each other again. It had become a daily occurrence since they came home for the holidays.
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     "At this rate, no man will marry you", Kelechi barked, "unless he wants to die before his time. You are just too stubborn".
     "No woman will marry you either 'cause you are just too lazy and stupid", Tochi retorted. As Janet walked in, Kelechi ran to her for an ally. 
     "What is the matter this time?" she asked.
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     "This yeye girl has refused to cook even though it's already lunch time", he replied.
     "Why won't you cook, Tochi?" Janet intervened.
     "I don't believe that question is for me", Tochi responded.
     "Are you being rude to me?" her mother queried.
     "If you don't want me to be rude to you, then stay out of this. I wake up each morning, sweep the house, wash the dishes, cook and serve the food and what does this oaf do but sit around playing with his laptop? I'm not doing it anymore!"
     "I don't play with my laptop", Kelechi protested, "I work on ..."
     "You maybe arranging a startup like Bill Gates years ago for all I care", Tochi interrupted. "But except you do your share of the work around here, I will not enter that kitchen again!" And with that, she stormed out of the house ignoring my mum's calls and Kelechi's taunts.
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     Janet gave Kelechi money to buy food from a nearby restaurant. She needed to pick the carton of hair relaxers she forgot at home and get back to her customers at the beauty salon. Cooking had scarcely been part of her schedule since she lost her husband in an auto crash six months ago. She lived on takeouts, focusing on raising enough money for the family's upkeep and because the twins were in boarding school, it hadn't posed a problem till they arrived for their first holidays since the funeral two weeks ago.
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     She wanted to address the problem but she just didn't know how. She didn't want to alienate any of her kids by coming down hard on them. They were all she had now that her husband had left. But she couldn't let them fight endlessly either. She wished she had the means to hire domestic help so that they could both pursue their hobbies to their satisfaction and not feel forlorn because their dad, who had also been their friend, had passed.
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     She decided she would close shop earlier than her usual 9 p.m. that day  to cook dinner and help the twins work out their differences. Unfortunately, she worked till 10:15 p.m. because it was a Saturday. She hoped they would be in bed by the time she returned. She was feeling too tired to listen to their arguments and complaints.
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     By the time she got home 15 minutes later, an unmistakeable aroma was wafting in from the kitchen. Bitter leaf soup was in the making and she heaved a sigh of relief. Tochi came to get her bag. 
     "My mummy original!" she hailed Janet. "The best mother in the whole universe!"
     "To what do I owe this kind of reception? I hope you don't want some money 'cause I'm saving for your school fees." 
      "Money kwa? I just want to apologise for what happened in the afternoon. I'm cooking your favourite soup. Take a shower and come have a bite. I think you're working way too hard."
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      "Where's your brother?"
      "Where else? I pray that laptop crashes soon ... "
      "And that is a prayer that will never be answered!" Kelechi interjected as he joined them in the living room. "Mum, you're home late today. I think you should take things a little easier", he added.
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      "Perhaps, I can come and help you at work sometimes", Tochi offered as they followed Janet into her bedroom. "You know I can braid hair really well."
      "Who will do the cooking around here if you do that?" Kelechi asked.
      "Shame on you! All you care about is your stomach and that wretched computer of yours. If Mum breaks down, who will buy the food you want cooked for you? You just have to do some chores here so I can put in a few hours at the salon everyday."
      "But Mum hasn't even said she wants you there," Kelechi pointed out.
They both looked at their mum for her input.
      "Actually, I do", she said. "Tochi weaves superbly and if she puts in an appearance often, it would be a relief. It's been hard finding capable hands since my last two staff left".
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      "It's settled then", Tochi said, sticking out her tongue at Kelechi as she returned to the kitchen. "Told you I'd sort you out", she added as he followed her.
     "I'm only doing it for Mum, not for your sassy a#s", Kelechi shot back.
     "Whatever!" Tochi responded with a chuckle.
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                                                           -The end-
Ⓒ  Edith Ugochi Ohaja  2015