Why President Jonathan Cannot Lead

[Pius Adesanmi]

Why President Jonathan Cannot Lead

Pius Adesanmi

�Gentlemen, welcome to this emergency meeting. Today is a sad day for our country, as you all know. Apart from the lives we lost, the bombing of the UN building is a source of great embarrassment for Nigeria. I have summoned you all so we can quickly agree on the president�s immediate response.�

�Thank you, Oronto. As the Special Adviser to the President on Media and Publicity, I swung into action immediately. I have already drafted a press statement. In fact, I was on my way to secure presidential clearance to release the statement when I got your summon.�



�Em� Ken, what do you think?�

�Thanks, Oronto. Well, it�s a good thing that Reuben has acted so quickly. His reflexes are good. But the country has just suffered a major terrorist attack. We are talking the UN here. This is huge international stuff. Should Nigerians and the international community be comforted by a presidential messenger?�

�Ken, take time. Seriously, take your time. Who is a messenger? Look, Oronto did not summon us here to insult each other o�

�Sorry, Reuben, it came out wrongly. Reno, what do you think? What would Trippi advice that we do?�

�Em, cool temper gentlemen. I think Ken has a point. Once a country is hit by a major international tragedy, the management of that tragedy becomes the yardstick for measuring the quality of its leadership. Look at the recent Norway bombings. Within minutes of the tragedy, the Norwegian Prime Minister was all over the world�s airwaves - from CNN to BBC via Aljazeera � comforting his citizens and reassuring the international community. Spectacle and perception are crucial in this business. Nothing beats the image of a hands-on leader getting to the trenches to comfort his people and the world.�

�Exactly! My sentiments, Reno! We also saw the British Prime Minister in action during the recent London riots. He cut short his vacation and returned home to lead. He was constantly in the street, addressing his country and the world.�

�Yes o, Ken, it was reassuring seeing the British Prime Minister. Not to mention what an American President would do in these circumstances: rousing and reassuring speeches to Americans and the world atop the rubble within minutes of an attack. Reuben, do you understand what we are talking about now?

�Ok, Reno, you and Ken have a point. So what do we do, Oronto?�

�Well, if I understand you guys, you seem to be suggesting that instead of Reuben�s press statement, we should throw the President out there so he can address Nigerians and the world in front of cameras?�

�Not only that, Oronto, he should also rush to the scene of the tragedy with little or no siren. He should be dressed in jeans or khaki and should go there to lead rescue workers for five minutes and reassure a traumatized nation. BBC, CNN, Aljazeera, and Reuters are all there. Even NTA is there. Let him stop in front of their microphones to take questions and comfort the Nigerian people.�

�Are you guys serious?�

�Oronto, do we look like we are joking?�

�Either you are joking or you have forgotten the problem�

�The problem?�

�Yes, the problem. I will jolt your memories. Ken, do you remember your recent interview with that Canadian newspaper, the Globe and Mail?�

�Ah, yes, I remember.�

�Good, what did you tell them about the President�s stage presence?�

�Ah, yes, I said that�s the only area he needs to work on. Em� I mean, I praised him so much it was looking ridiculous so I had to throw in something that at least looks like a weakness to make him human. So I said that he needs to improve his stage presence�

�Don�t worry, Ken, we are not blaming you. You guys are here talking about young, charismatic, and energetic world leaders who are masters of oratory. People who can give unscripted, impromptu speeches and electrify their audience. And you want us to throw oga out there and make him perform like those people? Are we miracle workers? Reuben, are you a miracle worker?�

�Well guys, you know I am new here and Reno told me last week that I am not paid to think the things I used to think when I was outside. It�s not that I haven�t thought of that little problem�

�Little problem? Reuben, you call that little problem? Look, we are all talking strictly off the record here. Nothing said will ever leave this room. Not a word will leak. This is a we-we situation and we can talk frankly and freely. Ken, tell Reuben.�

�I should tell him?�

�Yes, tell him�

�Well, Reuben, the truth is that it takes us 1000 hours of coaching and practicing to prepare Oga to read a five-minute speech on TV. And you know what Nigerians and the world still think of his performance with all that effort. Whenever Oga is going abroad, we do nearly 3000 hours of coaching. That CNN interview with Christian Amanpour, you have no idea how many hours we sweated to prepare Oga. And you know the result. So, truth is, Oga just doesn�t have it. He will never electrify an audience. He will never not look sleepy, lost, and uninspiring in public. There is just no way to improve Oga�s stage presence. That�s the truth we all whisper to ourselves around here but our job is to protect him from that glaring weakness. �

�That�s the truth gentlemen. If after thousands of hours of coaching, we only manage to get Oga to perform below average in scripted interviews and public speeches, imagine the disaster of throwing him in front of the world�s cameras unscripted today of all days. It will worsen the tragedy we have on our hands. We lost eighteen lives today. This is no time to add to Nigerians� anguish by reminding them of words like clueless and lost when they see their president on TV.�

�Ok, Oronto, I guess we need to take a vote on how to proceed. The Minister of State for Foreign Affairs has already spoken on BBC. Ban Ki-Moon has already spoken. And the world still hasn�t heard from the President. There is no time to waste.�

�Ok, all in favour of Reuben acting in loco parentis for the president say �aye�

Reno: Aye!

Ken: Aye!

Oronto: Aye!

Reuben: Aye!

�Gentlemen, we have a decision. Reuben, go and release the statement. I�ll go and brief the President.�

Presidential Press Statement

President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan and the Government of the Federal Republic of Nigeria utterly condemn the barbaric, senseless and cowardly attack on the United Nation�s Building in Abuja this morning.

The President believes that the attack is a most despicable assault on the United Nations� objectives of global peace and security, and the sanctity of human life to which Nigeria wholly subscribes.

He extends his sincere condolences to the Secretary-General of the United Nations, Mr. Ban Ki-Moon and all members of the United Nations family who have lost loved ones in the heinous attack.

President Jonathan reaffirms the Federal Government�s total commitment to vigorously combat the incursion of all forms of terrorism into Nigeria, and wishes to reassure all Nigerians and the international community that his Administration will spare no effort to bring the perpetrators to justice.

The President has also directed all relevant government agencies to assist in the search and rescue effort at the UN Building, and ordered heightened security across the Federal Capital Territory.

He urges all Nigerians to cooperate fully with the government in its efforts to expose the desperate elements who promote violence, terrorism and division in the country.

While noting that by today�s attack, we are once again reminded of the international character of terrorism and its indiscriminate targeting of innocent civilians, President Jonathan affirms Nigeria�s determination to continue to play its part in the global effort to eradicate the scourge of terrorism in all its ramifications.

He urges all Nigerians and foreigners resident in the country to go about their normal affairs with the full assurance that the Federal Government and its law enforcement agencies will continue working diligently to ensure the full protection of lives and property in the country.

Signed:

Reuben Abati, Ph.D

Special Adviser to the President

(Media & Publicity)

August 26, 2011

Read full article

[shinycoin]

Meanwhile, why does Reuben Abati always have to add Ph.D after his name?

Na to remind us of his learning?... We never doubted that from reading his articles in the Guardian newspaper, but why has he fallen into the Nigerian mindset of adding titles and accolades after his name?

Well, i guess we have to at least be happy he didn't add First class honours in bracket after everything...

Another good write up again Pius.

We hope you too don't answer to the call of lucre and head to Abuja to Reuben Abati all of us!!!

[First-lady]

Meanwhile, why does Reuben Abati always have to add Ph.D after his name?

Na to remind us of his learning?... We never doubted that from reading his articles in the Guardian newspaper, but why has he fallen into the Nigerian mindset of adding titles and accolades after his name?

Well, i guess we have to at least be happy he didn't add First class honours in bracket after everything...

Another good write up again Pius.

We hope you too don't answer to the call of lucre and head to Abuja to Reuben Abati all of us!!!

If you had a PhD,you would too
is it easy?
That is his official identity
some go by Dr so and so
others prefer to add their degree after their names
I'm sure he doesn't add the title to email ,greeting cards and letters to friends and family but only in official write ups
that is just OK
biko stop jelosing the man jor

[shinycoin]

If you had a PhD,you would too
is it easy?
That is his official identity
some go by Dr so and so
others prefer to add their degree after their names
I'm sure he doesn't add the title to email ,greeting cards and letters to friends and family but only in official write ups
that is just OK
biko stop jelosing the man jor

null

FL my sista,
na true you talk jare, nor mind me
na jealousy dey do me..lol

Even if we collectively yab Abati, one thing cannot be taken away from him sha: his intelligence and the quality of his writings..

I swear Abati is the best thing thats happened to journalism in the last twenty years..

The man's intelligence and the depth and quality of his writings are so glaring that if you read his works and compare it to some other writers on this forum and elsewhere. you'll shake your head in shame.

Maybe one other that comes close and in his class is Levi Obijiofor in Australia.

[Dove]

Wonders shall never end! So Mr. Shinycoin, na census be this one abi na wetin?

So all these intelectuals for this forum, na only RA and Levi their grammar dey fear you? Na wao.

As for me, I cover myself with my mbroda any time I dey visit this website ooo. The grammar pass me.

[First-lady]

null

FL my sista,
na true you talk jare, nor mind me
na jealousy dey do me..lol

Even if we collectively yab Abati, one thing cannot be taken away from him sha: his intelligence and the quality of his writings..

I swear Abati is the best thing thats happened to journalism in the last twenty years..

The man's intelligence and the depth and quality of his writings are so glaring that if you read his works and compare it to some other writers on this forum and elsewhere. you'll shake your head in shame.

Maybe one other that comes close and in his class is Levi Obijiofor in Australia.

I had no clue who the man was till the thread about his Jonathan appointment
I hope he stands many steps away from GEJ as he is carrying his briefcase since land no dey level again for Naija

[Chi2]

Quote: "Look at the recent Norway bombings. Within minutes of the tragedy, the Norwegian Prime Minister was all over the world�s airwaves - from CNN to BBC via Aljazeera � comforting his citizens and reassuring the international community. Spectacle and perception are crucial in this business. Nothing beats the image of a hands-on leader getting to the trenches to comfort his people and the world.� - Pius Adesanmi

You are right here, Pius. A leader's presence at the scene of disaster sends out comforting and therapeutic ripples. Mere presence in such a situation is more that a thousand words of condolence. The presence of Chilean President at San Jose copper mine when a cave-in trapped 33 miners brought succor to the miners and their families. You cited the reaction of the Norwegian PM to the recent Norwegian tragedy and many others. Such visits show, among other things that their leaders care. Even though the premises is a UN property, majority of fatalities and casualties are fellow Nigerians.

I am beginning to think that President Jonathan's intention to visit the UN building, the scene of the bomb blast may have been stalled by the Security Agency, who may have harboured the fear of a second blast.

P/S: Why the UN? I have a feeling that the UN was targeted because of its resolution on Libya. It's a revenge attack. The embassy buildings of those countries that participated in the aerial bombardment of Libya must reinforce security measures around their embassy premises. They could be the next target. This analysis is speculative.

[Bill Carson]

If you had a PhD,you would too
is it easy?
That is his official identity
some go by Dr so and so
others prefer to add their degree after their names
I'm sure he doesn't add the title to email ,greeting cards and letters to friends and family but only in official write ups
that is just OK
biko stop jelosing the man jor

Kids as young as 25 years are PHD holders in western universities without any fanfare and they only use the prefix within academic environment.

Nigerians should stop wasting their time acquiring elaborate degrees and concentrate on societal development.

I don�t even know what significant theory Abati has ever come up with apart from acquiring controversial land in Abuja and rushing off to Aso Rock to champion undemocratic attempt of tenure elongation through the back door (7yrs single term).

[denker]

Kids as young as 25 years are PHD holders in western universities without any fanfare and they only use the prefix within academic environment.

Nigerians should stop wasting their time acquiring elaborate degrees and concentrate on societal development.

I don�t even know what significant theory Abati has ever come up with apart from acquiring controversial land in Abuja and rushing off to Aso Rock to champion undemocratic attempt of tenure elongation through the back door (7yrs single term).

nnah dis fulani-man, BC, be real big liar.....mallam stop deceiving yaself.,..wahali!

[Bill Carson]

nnah dis fulani-man, BC, be real big liar.....mallam stop deceiving yaself.,..wahali!

Mallam Denker,

Go checkout Scottish Universities and see young kids (24 � 27yrs) with PHD plenty plenty�. you may not know, because you only move with over aged mature students like yourself.

[denker]

Mallam Denker, Go checkout Scottish Universities and see young kids (24 � 27yrs) with PHD plenty plenty�. you may not know, because you only move with over aged mature students like yourself.

mallam stop dat nonsense...if ya say 27 yrs...dat na realistic age..bcos 1.i get ma labo at uni and 2 i had ma own with 30 yrs, but 24, 25, 26..no way...au revoir!

anywaz, me neva heard of any serious research works or inventions from scottland...scottland for me na developing nation...there's notding serious going on there...dem live on fossil fuel...abi?

[Bill Carson]

mallam stop dat nonsense...if ya say 27 yrs...dat na realistic age..bcos 1.i get ma labo at uni and 2 i had ma own with 30 yrs, but 24, 25, 26..no way...au revoir!

anywaz, me neva heard of any serious research works or inventions from scottland...scottland for me na developing nation...there's notding serious going on there...dem live on fossil fuel...abi?

Mallam Denker,

Make you re revoir!, all you need to do is call few prominent Scottish universities (Engineering depts.) with proper Onyibo students and hear for yourself. Because you complete your first degree at age 29, no mean say you should use that for future template.

[emj]

While noting that by today�s attack, we are once again reminded of the international character of terrorism and its indiscriminate targeting of innocent civilians, President Jonathan affirms Nigeria�s determination to continue to play its part in the global effort to eradicate the scourge of terrorism in all its ramifications.

U must be kidding ......right?

[Chi2]

Contrary to your assertion, President Jonathan did visit the UN building in the aftermath of the bomb blast. The visit was on August 27. See URL link below.

http://nigeriaworld.com/images/news/big/bombing/abuja-un-building-082611-14.jpg

[Agidimolaja]

President Jonathan - Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!



Bill Carson, you are right about it that in the West, there are several PhD holders {including younger ones} but they don't parade their credential as we do in Nigeria.

There are millions of Engineer here in USA alone but never have I seen one putting "Engr" before his name as it is today characteristic of many of our Nigeria's quasi Engineers.

It is really annoying to see the number and quality of people in Nigeria putting "Dr" before their names.

Many of our people love tittle{Jerusalem Pilgrim - JP},love vain glory{Engr} and are needlessly silly{ Dr. , when it is not necessary or required}and arrogant.

Did late Ayodele Awojobi ever put "Engr" in before his name even though he was a qualified Engineer? Except when it became extremely necessary, I can't remember whenlate Tai Solarinwas parading himself all over the land as "Dr. " or insertingPhD after he wrote his name.

[tonsoyo]

Mallam Denker,

Go checkout Scottish Universities and see young kids (24 � 27yrs) with PHD plenty plenty�. you may not know, because you only move with over aged mature students like yourself.

Well just to shame you Abati actually got his Ph.D at age 24!

He is a Presidential Spokesperson he must have a signature by which he want to be known and has decided to make it Reuben Abati Ph.D wetin be your own problem with dat?

Do not forget that the man is also a Lawyer oh, and could have put Barrister (Dr.) Reuben Abati or like a typical Nigerian, Barrister Reuben Abati, BA, MA Ph.d LL.B (Hons) You wan tell me say his choice is not simple enough?

[agensheku]

President Jonathan - Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!

Bill Carson,you are right about it that in the West,there are several PhD holders {including younger ones} but they don't parade their credential as we do in Nigeria.
There are millions of Engineer here in USA alone but never have I seen one putting "Engr" before his name as it is today characteristic of many of our Nigeria's quasi Engineers.
It is really annoying to see the number and quality of people in Nigeria putting "Dr" before their names.
Many of our people love tittle{Jerusalem Pilgrim - JP}, love vain glory{Engr} and are needlessly silly{ Dr.,when it is not necessary or required} and arrogant.
Did late Ayodele Awojobi ever put "Engr" in before his name even though he was a qualified Engineer? Except when it became extremely necessary,I can't remember when late Tai Solarin was parading himself all over the land as "Dr." or inserting PhD after he wrote his name.

Nijas are title crazy!Engr,Architect,Surveyor,Chemist,etc precedes their names.The titles are so bastardised musicians took over...Commander,Barrister,King,etc. Even the generator mechanic in my area who is a virtual semi-illiterate answers "Engineer".Many people dont know that the title "Alhaji" means a pilgrim.Yet,our people go to Mecca,return to their country and permanently retains the title Alhaji/a for the rest of their lives,thereby becoming permanent pilgrim/tourist,even at home!

And na so-so title we see and hear,wey the productivity or achievements to prove the worth of the titles?

Seriously,if Ph.D has to tutor another Ph.D to speak or appear in public,what does that say of our choice of leaders?Remember Megida too was Msc Chemistry or something and his chemistry never jelled with Nijas all thru.

In future,shall we settle for Political scientists? At least they know they would be dealing with humans,unlike someone whose discipline is holding monologue with zoo animals?