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Sonala Olumhense
May 16, 2010, 11:40 AM
<strong>The Man They Couldn't Arrest</strong>
<p><em>By Sonola Olumhense</em></p>
<p><strong>I</strong>n Aso Rock, he clinked champagne glasses with men of power and privilege. On the beaches of South Africa, he partied till the small hours, and then he moved indoors, changed women, and continued.</p>
<p>On the streets of London, foot soldiers and mistresses of no fixed address negotiated deals and bought property for him. In Lagos and Abuja and Asaba, people moved mountains for him so he would have real estate to lodge mountains of money.<img alt="Ibori" style="margin: 10px; float: left;" src="http://maxsiollun.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/ibori2.jpg" width="350" /></p>
<p>In Accra, he hunted down the best estates and cornered the best property money could buy. In Dubai, he built mansions fit for Arab royalty, and demanded beds Arab royalty had yet to think of. In Canada, he wanted to buy a $20 million Challenger jet from Bombardier Incorporated, in cash if Bombardier desired.</p>
<p>In Abuja, the front gate opened to admit him long before visiting Heads of State had even left the airport. In Oghara, his hometown, he persuaded the youths to lay down their lives for him.</p>
<p>He might as well have been James Bond. His name: Ibori, James Ibori.</p>
<p>Mr. Ibori must have been persuasive in ways we could not readily see. In 2007, he helped fund the election bid of his former colleague in the Governors' Forum, Umaru Yar'Adua. It was the best insurance money could buy, because once Yar'Adua became president, Ibori knew he was a free man.</p>
<p>One year ago, Yar'Adua basically confirmed the national suspicion that during his time in charge, thieving former governors were untouchable. "We are determined to intensify the war against corruption, more so because corruption is itself central to the spread of poverty," Yar'Adua bragged to a newspaper.</p>
<p>But asked about people like Ibori, Yar'Adua immediately wagged a stubborn finger, saying, "These former governors are my colleagues. We had worked together for eight years. Because I am the President, I cannot just jettison people I know. I am always very careful to separate my personal relationship with people from my state duties."</p>
<p>Yar'Adua was as good as his word: he separated his favourite looters and their loot from the law, a policy of which the chief beneficiary was Ibori. Throughout Yar'Adua's time in Abuja, Ibori came and went as he pleased. He enjoyed great power, trading in influence in the highest of places.</p>
<p>Yar'Adua even permitted him to keep his diplomatic passport, despite the protests of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission. The ex-convict's legal problems were considerable at home and abroad, but he was never harassed by a fly, let alone bitten by a bee. Ibori chose his own drinks and selected his own prostitutes, one of whom told the press how badly Ibori's breath stinks. The British prevented him from buying his dream jet and scared him off the streets of London, but he was having the time of his life.</p>
<p>In addition to Yar'Adua at the centre, Ibori's swagger was upheld in Delta State by Emmanuel Uduaghan, who took over as governor in 2007. Between both men, Ibori was able to smirk through his so-called trial for corruption at the Federal High Court. All the charges were dismissed.</p>
<p>That may be why, in his head, Ibori is not just a king; he is a king among kings. He calls himself the Odidigborigbo of Africa. Whatever that might not mean, it certainly means he feels he transcends his people of Oghara. Since neither Delta State nor Nigeria awards chieftaincy titles, he evidently wanted to award himself one that was loud enough for everyone to hear in Outer Mongolia.</p>
<p>I am pretty sure they did. The British put his life under every conceivable microscope and computed the number of hairs on Ibori's back. They knew from which side he likes to pour his wine. They knew which of his ears is more sensitive. They knew what kind of women he ordered in South Africa, as distinct from his preferences in Ghana. They knew how the smell changed in the Emirates when Ibori shopped Dubai Duty Free.</p>
<p>Yes, he was loud enough for them to hear him. And last week, despite his bragging the British would never find him, they came for him. In Dubai.</p>
<p>The story had been that Nigeria law-enforcement agents wanted him. They said the police had traced him to Oghara, where Ibori apparently disappeared in a puff of mischief. They said Goodluck Jonathan had insisted that Inspector-General Ogbonnaya Onovo, whose men personally guarded Ibori, produce the man.</p>
<p>But Ibori "disappeared."</p>
<p>Through a thicket of EFCC spies and informants and operatives, Ibori vanished. Through a forest of his own police guards and the Delta State police command, Ibori disappeared. Through rings of our arrogant immigration and Customs officials, Ibori vanished. ..until the British knocked on his door in Dubai.</p>
<p>If I were Jonathan, I would be incensed. If I were Onovo, I would not show my face in public until after Christmas. There are some embarrassments you cannot explain to your wife, no matter how patient she is.</p>
<p>Not that it matters. Ibori, an ex-and future convict, may have been foolish enough to think that his good fortune would last forever, but it was always clear his fate depended on Yar'Adua's troubled kidneys. When they called on November 23, 2009 to tell him Yar'Adua had collapsed and was being evacuated to Saudi Arabia, I do not think he feared it would all crumble so quickly.</p>
<p>Which must explain why the kitchen cabinet of the dying leader lied so hard and fought so hard (and prayed so hard, it must be assumed) that Yar'Adua last...one more budget cycle.</p>
<p>But now, Ibori it gets really interesting. Ibori can commit suicide, but he can hide no more. By choosing to flee Oghara, the ex-governor involuntary cast himself adrift beyond Nigeria's boundaries, and gave British investigators that Dubai whiff of him they had been sniffing in the wind.</p>
<p>Almost without a doubt, the next image of Ibori will be of the Odidigborigbo in handcuffs, reluctantly shuffling into a British court, drained of his bluster. There, he will set hands on a bevy of women in the dock. Trying not to fall on his face, he will look at the shackles on his ankles, whereupon he will find himself shoved between two of the women.</p>
<p>Looking up, the Odidigborigbo will find, to one side, his wife Theresa; and to the other, his mistress Mrs. Udoamaka Okoronkwo. Flanking them will be his former personal assistant, Ms. Bimpe Pogoson and his sister, and Christine Ibori-Ibie. All of them, along with his lawyer, are currently undergoing assorted money-laundering charges. Together, they had played a thousand games with millions of British pounds. The women will most probably go to Holloway Prison, the men to Brixton; a poetic resolution to ensure they are within a convenient visiting distance for the Ibori-loving British MP, Tony Baldry.</p>
<p>Ibori claims the "trial" he received in Asaba was fair. Most of us believe that kangaroo insult of a courtroom-and he-are proof of the triumph of impunity and atrocious governance in Nigeria. Ibori says he is being "persecuted" because of his "political belief;" most of us believe greed to be his only faith.</p>
<p>But I jump too far ahead. I see the present to be a win-win equation for both Ibori and the people of Nigeria, as both sides will finally get justice. Ibori will get the chance to demonstrate his "political belief," which, I expect to be a University of Benin Founders' Day-style treatise on easy graft in Nigerian public life, while we get to see him condemned to jail in the same way he condemned the people of Delta State to perpetual poverty.</p>
<p>Yes, Ibori is only one crook, I know, but he is one too many, and I look forward to his being separated from every penny. And I look forward to the hunting-down of all his associates, including those that are still in positions of power and blackmail in Delta State.</p>
<p>For me, Ibori's sunset is an epochal triumph. In celebration, I promise to party in an Asaba hotel.</p>
<p>* <a href="mailto:sonala.olumhense@gmail.com">sonala.olumhense@gmail.com</a></p><br><br><a target="_blank" href=http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=15517><b>..Read the full article</b></a><br>

Gladiator
May 16, 2010, 11:40 AM
<strong>The Man They Couldn't Arrest</strong>
<p><em>By Sonola Olumhense</em></p>
<p><strong>I</strong>n Aso Rock, he clinked champagne glasses with men of power and privilege. On the beaches of South Africa, he partied till the small hours, and then he moved indoors, changed women, and continued.</p>
<p>On the streets of London, foot soldiers and mistresses of no fixed address negotiated deals and bought property for him. In Lagos and Abuja and Asaba, people moved mountains for him so he would have real estate to lodge mountains of money.<img alt="Ibori" style="margin: 10px; float: left;" src="http://maxsiollun.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/ibori2.jpg" width="350" /></p>
<p>In Accra, he hunted down the best estates and cornered the best property money could buy. In Dubai, he built mansions fit for Arab royalty, and demanded beds Arab royalty had yet to think of. In Canada, he wanted to buy a $20 million Challenger jet from Bombardier Incorporated, in cash if Bombardier desired.</p>
<p>In Abuja, the front gate opened to admit him long before visiting Heads of State had even left the airport. In Oghara, his hometown, he persuaded the youths to lay down their lives for him.</p>
<p>He might as well have been James Bond. His name: Ibori, James Ibori.</p>
<p>Mr. Ibori must have been persuasive in ways we could not readily see. In 2007, he helped fund the election bid of his former colleague in the Governors' Forum, Umaru Yar'Adua. It was the best insurance money could buy, because once Yar'Adua became president, Ibori knew he was a free man.</p>
<p>One year ago, Yar'Adua basically confirmed the national suspicion that during his time in charge, thieving former governors were untouchable. "We are determined to intensify the war against corruption, more so because corruption is itself central to the spread of poverty," Yar'Adua bragged to a newspaper.</p>
<p>But asked about people like Ibori, Yar'Adua immediately wagged a stubborn finger, saying, "These former governors are my colleagues. We had worked together for eight years. Because I am the President, I cannot just jettison people I know. I am always very careful to separate my personal relationship with people from my state duties."</p>
<p>Yar'Adua was as good as his word: he separated his favourite looters and their loot from the law, a policy of which the chief beneficiary was Ibori. Throughout Yar'Adua's time in Abuja, Ibori came and went as he pleased. He enjoyed great power, trading in influence in the highest of places.</p>
<p>Yar'Adua even permitted him to keep his diplomatic passport, despite the protests of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission. The ex-convict's legal problems were considerable at home and abroad, but he was never harassed by a fly, let alone bitten by a bee. Ibori chose his own drinks and selected his own prostitutes, one of whom told the press how badly Ibori's breath stinks. The British prevented him from buying his dream jet and scared him off the streets of London, but he was having the time of his life.</p>
<p>In addition to Yar'Adua at the centre, Ibori's swagger was upheld in Delta State by Emmanuel Uduaghan, who took over as governor in 2007. Between both men, Ibori was able to smirk through his so-called trial for corruption at the Federal High Court. All the charges were dismissed.</p>
<p>That may be why, in his head, Ibori is not just a king; he is a king among kings. He calls himself the Odidigborigbo of Africa. Whatever that might not mean, it certainly means he feels he transcends his people of Oghara. Since neither Delta State nor Nigeria awards chieftaincy titles, he evidently wanted to award himself one that was loud enough for everyone to hear in Outer Mongolia.</p>
<p>I am pretty sure they did. The British put his life under every conceivable microscope and computed the number of hairs on Ibori's back. They knew from which side he likes to pour his wine. They knew which of his ears is more sensitive. They knew what kind of women he ordered in South Africa, as distinct from his preferences in Ghana. They knew how the smell changed in the Emirates when Ibori shopped Dubai Duty Free.</p>
<p>Yes, he was loud enough for them to hear him. And last week, despite his bragging the British would never find him, they came for him. In Dubai.</p>
<p>The story had been that Nigeria law-enforcement agents wanted him. They said the police had traced him to Oghara, where Ibori apparently disappeared in a puff of mischief. They said Goodluck Jonathan had insisted that Inspector-General Ogbonnaya Onovo, whose men personally guarded Ibori, produce the man.</p>
<p>But Ibori "disappeared."</p>
<p>Through a thicket of EFCC spies and informants and operatives, Ibori vanished. Through a forest of his own police guards and the Delta State police command, Ibori disappeared. Through rings of our arrogant immigration and Customs officials, Ibori vanished. ..until the British knocked on his door in Dubai.</p>
<p>If I were Jonathan, I would be incensed. If I were Onovo, I would not show my face in public until after Christmas. There are some embarrassments you cannot explain to your wife, no matter how patient she is.</p>
<p>Not that it matters. Ibori, an ex-and future convict, may have been foolish enough to think that his good fortune would last forever, but it was always clear his fate depended on Yar'Adua's troubled kidneys. When they called on November 23, 2009 to tell him Yar'Adua had collapsed and was being evacuated to Saudi Arabia, I do not think he feared it would all crumble so quickly.</p>
<p>Which must explain why the kitchen cabinet of the dying leader lied so hard and fought so hard (and prayed so hard, it must be assumed) that Yar'Adua last...one more budget cycle.</p>
<p>But now, Ibori it gets really interesting. Ibori can commit suicide, but he can hide no more. By choosing to flee Oghara, the ex-governor involuntary cast himself adrift beyond Nigeria's boundaries, and gave British investigators that Dubai whiff of him they had been sniffing in the wind.</p>
<p>Almost without a doubt, the next image of Ibori will be of the Odidigborigbo in handcuffs, reluctantly shuffling into a British court, drained of his bluster. There, he will set hands on a bevy of women in the dock. Trying not to fall on his face, he will look at the shackles on his ankles, whereupon he will find himself shoved between two of the women.</p>
<p>Looking up, the Odidigborigbo will find, to one side, his wife Theresa; and to the other, his mistress Mrs. Udoamaka Okoronkwo. Flanking them will be his former personal assistant, Ms. Bimpe Pogoson and his sister, and Christine Ibori-Ibie. All of them, along with his lawyer, are currently undergoing assorted money-laundering charges. Together, they had played a thousand games with millions of British pounds. The women will most probably go to Holloway Prison, the men to Brixton; a poetic resolution to ensure they are within a convenient visiting distance for the Ibori-loving British MP, Tony Baldry.</p>
<p>Ibori claims the "trial" he received in Asaba was fair. Most of us believe that kangaroo insult of a courtroom-and he-are proof of the triumph of impunity and atrocious governance in Nigeria. Ibori says he is being "persecuted" because of his "political belief;" most of us believe greed to be his only faith.</p>
<p>But I jump too far ahead. I see the present to be a win-win equation for both Ibori and the people of Nigeria, as both sides will finally get justice. Ibori will get the chance to demonstrate his "political belief," which, I expect to be a University of Benin Founders' Day-style treatise on easy graft in Nigerian public life, while we get to see him condemned to jail in the same way he condemned the people of Delta State to perpetual poverty.</p>
<p>Yes, Ibori is only one crook, I know, but he is one too many, and I look forward to his being separated from every penny. And I look forward to the hunting-down of all his associates, including those that are still in positions of power and blackmail in Delta State.</p>
<p>For me, Ibori's sunset is an epochal triumph. In celebration, I promise to party in an Asaba hotel.</p>
<p>* <a href="mailto:sonala.olumhense@gmail.com">sonala.olumhense@gmail.com</a></p><br><br><a target="_blank" href=http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=15517><b>..Read the full article</b></a><br>

Dapxin
May 16, 2010, 11:40 AM
<strong>The Man They Couldn't Arrest</strong>
<p><em>By Sonola Olumhense</em></p>
<p><strong>I</strong>n Aso Rock, he clinked champagne glasses with men of power and privilege. On the beaches of South Africa, he partied till the small hours, and then he moved indoors, changed women, and continued.</p>
<p>On the streets of London, foot soldiers and mistresses of no fixed address negotiated deals and bought property for him. In Lagos and Abuja and Asaba, people moved mountains for him so he would have real estate to lodge mountains of money.<img alt="Ibori" style="margin: 10px; float: left;" src="http://maxsiollun.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/ibori2.jpg" width="350" /></p>
<p>In Accra, he hunted down the best estates and cornered the best property money could buy. In Dubai, he built mansions fit for Arab royalty, and demanded beds Arab royalty had yet to think of. In Canada, he wanted to buy a $20 million Challenger jet from Bombardier Incorporated, in cash if Bombardier desired.</p>
<p>In Abuja, the front gate opened to admit him long before visiting Heads of State had even left the airport. In Oghara, his hometown, he persuaded the youths to lay down their lives for him.</p>
<p>He might as well have been James Bond. His name: Ibori, James Ibori.</p>
<p>Mr. Ibori must have been persuasive in ways we could not readily see. In 2007, he helped fund the election bid of his former colleague in the Governors' Forum, Umaru Yar'Adua. It was the best insurance money could buy, because once Yar'Adua became president, Ibori knew he was a free man.</p>
<p>One year ago, Yar'Adua basically confirmed the national suspicion that during his time in charge, thieving former governors were untouchable. "We are determined to intensify the war against corruption, more so because corruption is itself central to the spread of poverty," Yar'Adua bragged to a newspaper.</p>
<p>But asked about people like Ibori, Yar'Adua immediately wagged a stubborn finger, saying, "These former governors are my colleagues. We had worked together for eight years. Because I am the President, I cannot just jettison people I know. I am always very careful to separate my personal relationship with people from my state duties."</p>
<p>Yar'Adua was as good as his word: he separated his favourite looters and their loot from the law, a policy of which the chief beneficiary was Ibori. Throughout Yar'Adua's time in Abuja, Ibori came and went as he pleased. He enjoyed great power, trading in influence in the highest of places.</p>
<p>Yar'Adua even permitted him to keep his diplomatic passport, despite the protests of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission. The ex-convict's legal problems were considerable at home and abroad, but he was never harassed by a fly, let alone bitten by a bee. Ibori chose his own drinks and selected his own prostitutes, one of whom told the press how badly Ibori's breath stinks. The British prevented him from buying his dream jet and scared him off the streets of London, but he was having the time of his life.</p>
<p>In addition to Yar'Adua at the centre, Ibori's swagger was upheld in Delta State by Emmanuel Uduaghan, who took over as governor in 2007. Between both men, Ibori was able to smirk through his so-called trial for corruption at the Federal High Court. All the charges were dismissed.</p>
<p>That may be why, in his head, Ibori is not just a king; he is a king among kings. He calls himself the Odidigborigbo of Africa. Whatever that might not mean, it certainly means he feels he transcends his people of Oghara. Since neither Delta State nor Nigeria awards chieftaincy titles, he evidently wanted to award himself one that was loud enough for everyone to hear in Outer Mongolia.</p>
<p>I am pretty sure they did. The British put his life under every conceivable microscope and computed the number of hairs on Ibori's back. They knew from which side he likes to pour his wine. They knew which of his ears is more sensitive. They knew what kind of women he ordered in South Africa, as distinct from his preferences in Ghana. They knew how the smell changed in the Emirates when Ibori shopped Dubai Duty Free.</p>
<p>Yes, he was loud enough for them to hear him. And last week, despite his bragging the British would never find him, they came for him. In Dubai.</p>
<p>The story had been that Nigeria law-enforcement agents wanted him. They said the police had traced him to Oghara, where Ibori apparently disappeared in a puff of mischief. They said Goodluck Jonathan had insisted that Inspector-General Ogbonnaya Onovo, whose men personally guarded Ibori, produce the man.</p>
<p>But Ibori "disappeared."</p>
<p>Through a thicket of EFCC spies and informants and operatives, Ibori vanished. Through a forest of his own police guards and the Delta State police command, Ibori disappeared. Through rings of our arrogant immigration and Customs officials, Ibori vanished. ..until the British knocked on his door in Dubai.</p>
<p>If I were Jonathan, I would be incensed. If I were Onovo, I would not show my face in public until after Christmas. There are some embarrassments you cannot explain to your wife, no matter how patient she is.</p>
<p>Not that it matters. Ibori, an ex-and future convict, may have been foolish enough to think that his good fortune would last forever, but it was always clear his fate depended on Yar'Adua's troubled kidneys. When they called on November 23, 2009 to tell him Yar'Adua had collapsed and was being evacuated to Saudi Arabia, I do not think he feared it would all crumble so quickly.</p>
<p>Which must explain why the kitchen cabinet of the dying leader lied so hard and fought so hard (and prayed so hard, it must be assumed) that Yar'Adua last...one more budget cycle.</p>
<p>But now, Ibori it gets really interesting. Ibori can commit suicide, but he can hide no more. By choosing to flee Oghara, the ex-governor involuntary cast himself adrift beyond Nigeria's boundaries, and gave British investigators that Dubai whiff of him they had been sniffing in the wind.</p>
<p>Almost without a doubt, the next image of Ibori will be of the Odidigborigbo in handcuffs, reluctantly shuffling into a British court, drained of his bluster. There, he will set hands on a bevy of women in the dock. Trying not to fall on his face, he will look at the shackles on his ankles, whereupon he will find himself shoved between two of the women.</p>
<p>Looking up, the Odidigborigbo will find, to one side, his wife Theresa; and to the other, his mistress Mrs. Udoamaka Okoronkwo. Flanking them will be his former personal assistant, Ms. Bimpe Pogoson and his sister, and Christine Ibori-Ibie. All of them, along with his lawyer, are currently undergoing assorted money-laundering charges. Together, they had played a thousand games with millions of British pounds. The women will most probably go to Holloway Prison, the men to Brixton; a poetic resolution to ensure they are within a convenient visiting distance for the Ibori-loving British MP, Tony Baldry.</p>
<p>Ibori claims the "trial" he received in Asaba was fair. Most of us believe that kangaroo insult of a courtroom-and he-are proof of the triumph of impunity and atrocious governance in Nigeria. Ibori says he is being "persecuted" because of his "political belief;" most of us believe greed to be his only faith.</p>
<p>But I jump too far ahead. I see the present to be a win-win equation for both Ibori and the people of Nigeria, as both sides will finally get justice. Ibori will get the chance to demonstrate his "political belief," which, I expect to be a University of Benin Founders' Day-style treatise on easy graft in Nigerian public life, while we get to see him condemned to jail in the same way he condemned the people of Delta State to perpetual poverty.</p>
<p>Yes, Ibori is only one crook, I know, but he is one too many, and I look forward to his being separated from every penny. And I look forward to the hunting-down of all his associates, including those that are still in positions of power and blackmail in Delta State.</p>
<p>For me, Ibori's sunset is an epochal triumph. In celebration, I promise to party in an Asaba hotel.</p>
<p>* <a href="mailto:sonala.olumhense@gmail.com">sonala.olumhense@gmail.com</a></p><br><br><a target="_blank" href=http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=15517><b>..Read the full article</b></a><br>

PAPIG
May 16, 2010, 04:41 PM
IBORI IS THE CIVILIAN EQUIVALENT OF BABANGIDA

Unmitigated pecuniary greed and political power would be the ultimate downfall of this 'two side of the same coin'. One from the North and the other from South South.

Both these very unique thieves have die hard supporters they have cultivated from 'the grass roots'. They both have cultivated movers and shakers in the 'right, centre and left' of our political spectrum.

What the civilian lacks in military connections, he cultivates in some Niger Delta militants. Their firepower may outgun the established military and therefore the man from oghara cannot be seen as a 'junior partner'.

They both cannot remember the fate of Sergeant Doe of Liberia and this remain their achilles heels. Absolute thievery corrupts absolutely.

Auspicious
May 16, 2010, 06:43 PM
+

Brilliant, prose-like summary as usual from Mr. Olumehnse.

I celebrate the apprehension of that criminal - a timely humbling of one out of many similar arrogant kleptomaniacs masquerading as leaders of Nigeria. Another one has fallen victim to his own devices, and it matters little to me at this point that one dog might be sitting over the carcass of another. As long as these opportunists continue to cancel out one another, let that roulette roll on.

One thing that stood out to me on hearing of his 'disappearance' however was the ease with which such (disappearances) happen in Nigeria. Granted, his is likely a case of the 'authorities' looking the other way while he ran for cover. But what does one say of Nuhu Ribadu's visit to and departure from Nigeria while he had an arrest warrant out on him? Okay, maybe it was a matter of "espirit de corps", too.

Still, it reflects how porous security is in our country. We should probably count ourselves lucky that we aren't at war or any sort of bitter rivalry with other nations as we would only be mincemeat in the latter's hands. The same luck goes for everything else, take for instance natural disasters. Were any such thing as Haiti to happen in Nigeria, we can be sure that we'd just be as helpless as any other Banana Republic out there.

Anything goes in our homeland - anything! The President vanishes and those supposedly in charge can't agree on the next responsible thing to do (like empowering the next-in-charge) to keep affairs of state running. "The President returns" (in a body bag?) and someone unilaterally deployed troops without the acting-president getting a whiff of what is going on. People criss-cross the borders without undergoing any official processing.

As much as one tries to deny it, it really looks like Banana Republic. Anyways, James, James Ibori, has now been apprehended. Of course there are hundreds more like him to go - including those who made him, who empowered him, to be the perverted glutton that he was throughout his period in office. Then there are also those who protected him during and after his feast. Let them all continue to devour one another.

Welcome Odidigborigbo of Brixton.

smartomoge
May 16, 2010, 07:07 PM
Heeeee's BAAAAAACKKKKKKK! :hail:
Auspy, welcome back o. We don miss your big gramma for this obodo. Wetin u carry come?:hug:

Okay peeps, carry on.

Norris
May 16, 2010, 08:28 PM
Ibori chose his own drinks and selected his own prostitutes, one of whom told the press how badly Ibori's breath stinks.

That is the best part of this master piece lol. Weldone, can you please send us link to that story.
Blessed is the day that criminal would be brought to London in menacles.

Dapxin
May 16, 2010, 08:36 PM
Which Auspicious is that ? I mean, has Yaradua returned as promised ? Iro oooooooooo. eeeeeeeeewo :D :D I am goodluck Jonathan, Its an inAuspcicious time for any real comeback stories :D

Dapxin
May 16, 2010, 08:37 PM
Welcome Odidigborigbo of NigeriaVillagesquare. O leeeeeenu biiiiiii :D

Enyi
May 16, 2010, 08:57 PM
It was the best insurance money could buy, because once Yar'Adua became president, Ibori knew he was a free man.

No! it was a doomed investment from the start. First of all, Yar'Adua had a serious health problem even before his election. This therefore put to question the duration of his presidency right at its inception.
Secondly, change is the only constant in life. What guarentee did he have that under international pressure the presidency would not have sacrificed him.
A more pragmatic solution was the Odili approach. Odili got a perpetual injunction. Mark the word perpetual! So Odili does not need to go into hiding and there is nothing anybody can do about it. Yes, civil rights group may shout but it will not change anything. BTW is Orji Kalu not moving about freely in the country?
My advice to future Ibori's is that they must never trust the arm of flesh because it may fail them willy-nilly. Invest in the judiciary, get a perpetual immunity and then relax and enjoy your loot.
Finally, remember the immortal words of William Cowper:
We are never more in danger than when we think ourselves most secure, nor in reality more secure than when we seem to be most in danger.

K_Station
May 16, 2010, 10:01 PM
Ibori chose his own drinks and selected his own prostitutes, one of whom told the press how badly Ibori's breath stinks

With all that money & properties scattered all over the world, I guess he forgot to buy mouthwash! Another stank breath money-miss-road! Mints anyone?

Prof Penkelemess
May 16, 2010, 10:30 PM
Ibori and cohorts: Come ye all to the BLACK forest !!!

P.B. (not: IBB – but WHO knows …) is already here…

You have to bear with me: this needs some introduction , but
I shall eventually get to the point: I will ! (And I can assure
you that I shall be much shorter than Prof-O-such, his faithful
partner Cornelius H. from VIKING LEONE, and even Bode E.)

Let me begin on a very personal note, hoping you will ‘preciate.

After having successfully concluded two marriages I also retired
from German public radio. Unfortunately NOT ‘with full benefits',
as we normally do in Naija.
I must, however, also admit that I have only myself to blame,
since I retired early at the age 0f 45.
For this I am sometimes tempted, yes, to blame Africa. Well,
Not Africa in its totality, sorry, but rather French colonialism
in Africa.
Why? In the gold old days of AOF and AEF French colonial officers,
DOs and the whole lot were allowed to retire, to enjoy the
privilege of retiring at the age of…45, their years in mosquito-,
heat- or humidity-prone AFRICA counting double as
‘years worked in hardship countries'.

After having invested the major part of their fat colonial
salaries in some real estate on the French Riviera earlier
they then retired joyfully and in best health thereto. And
lived there happily ever after. (I can assure you :You can
still meet some of them there – as old as the biblical
Methusalem.)

That beautiful arrangement lasted till that fateful year 1960,
when France's African ‘belongings' – and some others
too, like f.e. Nigeria - gained their independence.

But all was not lost: far from it.

And that for two reasons: let me explain.

1. ‘Independence' was followed and immediately or kia-kia
so by ‘Development Aid', in which those same colonial
officers and their off-spring found the same cushy jobs like
before 1960.

2. Some of the new rulers liked the metropoli or colonial
motherlands so much, that they immediately started
investing in real estate in those same. The list is endless,
with one major exception : that of Leopold Sedar Senghor
of Senegal. When he retired to France, he did so to a Chateau
owned by his wealthy French wife.

You got me so far ??? I'm 'getting to the crux of the … NOW!

This being so – and Nigeria being the ‘African heavyweight';
and her Iboris, Abachas, Ibrus and other IBBs following in the
footsteps of the Mobutus, Biyas and other Sassou-Nguessous
(I do not want to bore you with too long a list!), I have now
come to the conclusion that my financial worries as a poor
German retiree (with NO full benefits, as I told you earlier!)
will not be solved by some self-RE-Deeming but by my going
into the REAL ESTATE business.

In this I will definitely be all the more successful since
I shall specialize in such estates situated exclusively in the
politically correct' BLACK forest here in the South of
Germany. (Please tell Ibori that the Swiss banks are only
a stone-throw, a cock's crow etc., a mere 90 miles away!!!)

I must, however, admit that the idea isn't really all mine
only: for some years already Paul Biya, your Camerounian
neighbour has been owning a fine piece of same REAL estate
in the spa-city of Baden-Baden. (We only found out because
he had parked his presidential plane in near-by Stuttgart, and
somebody forgot to pay the parking fee: so he got fined!)
But I am sure that Paul will forgive me for stealing his idea
About some posh real… in the politically …

If you want to invest or buy, you can simply write to me:

Prof. Pangloss Penkelemess or Prof Double-P at NVS.


PS:
And I DO hope that one Dr. R.A. will be one of my very first
customers. I am sire that by now somebody must have told
him that Abuja is, after all, only one such new-fangled
‘construct' like Brazilia… hot and dusty, whereas my own
BLACK forest is very… green.

I shall send you a coloured (!) prospectus if you are seriously
interested, but don't you try to 419 me.

ariteni
May 16, 2010, 10:49 PM
I'm afraid Ibori's trial in London will inflict great damage to Nigeria's international image and economy. EFCC should quickly dispatch an operative with "Iro" and "gele" so that he can escape dressed as a woman. When he arrives, they can then negotiate "plea bargain" like Igbinedion, Balogun, Buba Marwa, Bashir Dalhatu, Gov General Alamie etc etc etc. In that way, Nigeria gets something. EFCC should also try and catch one more Northern Gov and one Western so it may not be accused of "selective" justice and to balance things. (Bode George now looks victimised! Of all the corrupt Military Gov he's the only one in jail for a post-miliary offence) Of 36 corrupt Civilian Gov, we catch only two - and the two are from Niger Delta. Where is the Federal Character? Now, Yar Adua was a good man but he did one thing or two that hurts our interests. He provided cover for his corrupt colleagues ON CONDITION that they support him and THE PARTY. His death spoilt things for the govs.

I hope Dr Orji Kalu (for the East) will eventually find his way back to PDP as per the accord, otherwise he will have to flee Nigeria maza-maza. He is now in hiding. Mama Kalu has also returned from Benin and has been quiet. (Dr Mike Adenuga had to re-locate to Ghana until it was safe to come back to Nigeria.) Dr Kalu's lawyers already accused Dr Jonathan's Government of selective Justice because they demanded the Govt drop Kalu's charges as they have dropped Nuhu Ribadu's. He also boasts that he cannot go to jail when corrupt Ministers are walking free. (Baba Iyabo sold Abia to Kalu for a paltry 100m Naira in 1999). Perhaps the EFCC should move to recover about 100B Naira to let him off the hook (rather than look the other way and make the man live in perpetual fear) plus return back to PDP as agreed. (Atiku Abubakar has returned to PDP and there is an unspoken accord not to turn him in to US authorities for Money laundering etc)

As for PERPETUAL INJUNCTION, Abacha got his own before Baba Odili. So you have one North and one South. Sooner than later Nigeria will have to look for solution to the problem of abuse of judicial powers generally and especially INJUNCTIONS. 2011 promises to be interesting. But, my brother Enyi, "invest in Judiciary" ke?. That reminds me of one of our Yoruba Govs.
Is that why Bode George is in jail?

The Ibori phenomenon cannot be over until we are sure that it was the real Ibori that was caught in Dubai. Some people said that what the clerics saw was YarAdua's double. It may be that whom the Dubai Police caught was Ibori's double and that the real James Ibori is still in Ogbara.

Sonala complains about Onovo's Police failure to apprehend Ibori before he escaped overseas. It is not surprising because it is not in the character of Nigeria Police to apprehend thieving Govs and other big men. The real Ibori should "sing' and EFCC should recover all bribes paid by Ibori to flee Nigeria and to escape Justice. It is not yet uhuru. Three out of 36 is still a fail and if brought to Nigeria any Ibori (real or double) will laugh last again.

Prof Penkelemess
May 16, 2010, 11:04 PM
ARITENI,

make you go tell me kia-kia an in detaill HOW we go prevent dat damage to our dear

Naija: PLEASE-O !

But abeg: can you make it short and precise - like capital punishmenn !

TANK JU SO MOTCH

Prof Double-P

fulani
May 17, 2010, 01:24 AM
I like how you started your essay!!

Reminded me of the Dos Equis commercial.... the most interesting man in the world.. Very Nice:hail:

Bode Eluyera
May 17, 2010, 04:51 AM
+

Brilliant, prose-like summary as usual from Mr. Olumehnse.

I celebrate the apprehension of that criminal - a timely humbling of one out of many similar arrogant kleptomaniacs masquerading as leaders of Nigeria. Another one has fallen victim to his own devices, and it matters little to me at this point that one dog might be sitting over the carcass of another. As long as these opportunists continue to cancel out one another, let that roulette roll on.

One thing that stood out to me on hearing of his 'disappearance' however was the ease with which such (disappearances) happen in Nigeria. Granted, his is likely a case of the 'authorities' looking the other way while he ran for cover. But what does one say of Nuhu Ribadu's visit to and departure from Nigeria while he had an arrest warrant out on him? Okay, maybe it was a matter of "espirit de corps", too.

Still, it reflects how porous security is in our country. We should probably count ourselves lucky that we aren't at war or any sort of bitter rivalry with other nations as we would only be mincemeat in the latter's hands. The same luck goes for everything else, take for instance natural disasters. Were any such thing as Haiti to happen in Nigeria, we can be sure that we'd just be as helpless as any other Banana Republic out there.

Anything goes in our homeland - anything! The President vanishes and those supposedly in charge can't agree on the next responsible thing to do (like empowering the next-in-charge) to keep affairs of state running. "The President returns" (in a body bag?) and someone unilaterally deployed troops without the acting-president getting a whiff of what is going on. People criss-cross the borders without undergoing any official processing.

As much as one tries to deny it, it really looks like Banana Republic. Anyways, James, James Ibori, has now been apprehended. Of course there are hundreds more like him to go - including those who made him, who empowered him, to be the perverted glutton that he was throughout his period in office. Then there are also those who protected him during and after his feast. Let them all continue to devour one another.

Welcome Odidigborigbo of Brixton.

Auspy Baba!

Okunrin meta. Eni mo o ko. Eni ko o mo. Aferin b'omo leru! Iku Baba yeye. Thank God o 'The Baale of NVS' is hail and healthy. Glory be to all the Orishas and Irunmole in Yorubaland.

Bode Eluyera
May 17, 2010, 04:59 AM
The arrest of Ibori in Dubai is another evidence to prove that Nigeria is a failed state and the biggest Banana republic in the world. The whole of Nigerian Police Force and SSS could not arrest one man whose whereabout was well known to them; and he was able to travel abroad through a Nigerian airport under their nose. What a country!

It is also a testimony - as I wrote in my latest article "Why Jonathan, Aganga and Allison-Madueke must be removed now by any means and at any cost!" available on this site - to the fact that Jonathan's is dubious and a mishevious character because his order that Ibori should be arrested 'dead or alive' was not sincere and was more of a cheap and dirty P.R. to boost his popularity against the 2001 elections by creating the false impression that he is fighting corruption even when an indigene of the S.S. is concerned.

Dewdrops
May 17, 2010, 05:12 AM
Why can't these hateful Nigerians leave this man alone? Is he the only criminal in Nigeria?
Gosh!

Please leave our criminals for us Ooooooooooh! Go and deal with yours!
We love him that way.:2love:


Shiooooooooooooor!!!

Ibori for president jare.....2011!!!

James my dear.......knock 'em dead!!!

Bode Eluyera
May 17, 2010, 05:13 AM
Auspy Baba!

Okunrin meta. Eni mo o ko. Eni ko o mo. Aferin b'omo leru! Iku Baba yeye. Thank God o 'The Baale of NVS' is hail and healthy. Glory be to all the Orishas and Irunmole in Yorubaland.

Auspy! 'The Bobajiroro of Gbogbo Ile-Ekiti!"

Tempest
May 17, 2010, 09:49 AM
This is a wonderful article!

Bode Eluyera
May 17, 2010, 03:34 PM
Auspy Baba! Auspy Emure-Ekiti! Okunrin mewa! Igiripa omo 'Lawale! Akinkanju okunrin! Ogbori Elemosho! Auspy oniye. Auspy amofin! Auspy asofin! Auspy amuluro! Okunrin lo n ke si hun(yen)!. Okunrin jin jin jin! Okunrin ga ga ga! Ajanaku ti n migbo kijikiji! Baba o ti de o san ju Baba de jatijati lo o.

Auspy ma pa mi o, omo elomi ni kopa. Auspy ma se mi o, omo elomi ni kose! Majeobaje of Ile-Ekiti. Auspy wo lu, gbogbo olomoge le tiro. Omo tekun ba bi ekun naa ni yio jo!

K_Station
May 17, 2010, 04:22 PM
James my dear.......knock 'em dead!!!

I'm sure he already did... with his stank breath!

Enyi
May 17, 2010, 11:20 PM
@Ariteni
Is that why Bode George is in jail?

This was one of the reasons! Like Ibori, he invested in a president and remained untouchable until the president's tenure expired. Remember that Ribadu blew hot and cold over Bode. At one stage he claimed Bode was corrupt. Later he sang a different tune. Surely the arm of flesh will fail you. Now with hindsight, Bode must be regretting not investing in the judiciary. By the way, I do not believe that Kalu is in hiding. I suspect he is busy trying to ensure that his injunction is not overturned. Odili was very smart. Since the then AGF (a SAN) did not appeal against the injunction until the time allowed expired (please, do not ask me why), it means nobody can resuscitate it. Therefore he enjoys immunity for life.
It has occurred to me that our political scientists should hold regular seminars on how to be a successful politician in Nigeria. They will certainly smile to the bank after each seminar. It is on record that the book by Peter Pan (Peter Enahoro) entitled How to be a Nigerian was an instant hit.
Although I am not a political scientist, my thoughts on how to be a successful politician in Nigeria are as follows:
1). Join the largest party in Africa. Even if PDP implodes as many are predicting, move on to the next largest party in Africa. One of the advantages of belonging to the largest party in Africa is that your transgressions are regarded as family affair. Once, there was a Deputy-Governor in a South-South state whose 12-year-old son earned so much money from his hard work that he could afford to pay cash for a real estate in US. As soon as the DG was impeached, the largest party moved in, got the State House of Assembly to reverse the impeachment and arranged for the embattled DG to resign. Of course, he was given a more juicy appointment and nothing was ever heard of his hard working son any more.
2). Steal in billions. Millions will not carry you far. Actually, a colleague of mine during IBB years was happy when the Naira was devalued. When I enquired why, she retorted that she had always dreamed of being a millionaire's wife. With the devaluation, her dream had come true because with a few thousand dollars, her husband had become a millionaire. The lesson is that gone are the days when we admired people like Ojukwu's father, Dantata in Kano and Bank Anthony in Lagos who were millionaires. At that time, millionaires were extremely few. Now virtually every Emeka, Musa and Ade is a millionaire. So next move- be a billionaire, own estates abroad and buy a personal jet.
3). Ensure your safety. If I may paraphrase a statement from Macbeth: To be corrupt is nothing; but to be safely corrupt. While you are in the largest party in Africa, do not ruffle feathers. Ask Ogbulafor the significance of this. Igboamaeze and others have consistently condemned selective justice in Nigeria. How many members of the ruling class are listening? So as an Igbo saying goes- if you do not see what to do, do what you see. Therefore, you must make assurance doubly sure so that you can sleep in spite of thunder- buy judicial insurance. My friend Ariteni believes that Sooner than later Nigeria will have to look for solution to the problem of abuse of judicial powers generally and especially INJUNCTIONS. I suspect this may be later rather than sooner but I shall be glad if events prove me wrong. But until that happens, judicial insurance is the most potent security device in the market. BTW how did Wagbara get into the Senate?
PS: I almost forgot. Please, when shopping for priced real estate, avoid UK like a plague. You see, these colonialists do not understand the special nature of Nigeria. They will, probably out of envy or as a deliberate attempt to humiliate you, prosecute you if you attempt laundering your stolen money in UK. My advice, head for Dubai and Far_Eastern countries where they may think of you as a fool but will still let you launder your loot. After all, why should their opinion bother you?

Auspicious
May 18, 2010, 01:04 AM
Auspy Baba! Auspy Emure-Ekiti! Okunrin mewa! Igiripa omo 'Lawale! Akinkanju okunrin! Ogbori Elemosho! Auspy oniye. Auspy amofin! Auspy asofin! Auspy amuluro! Okunrin lo n ke si hun(yen)!. Okunrin jin jin jin! Okunrin ga ga ga! Ajanaku ti n migbo kijikiji! Baba o ti de o san ju Baba de jatijati lo o.

Auspy ma pa mi o, omo elomi ni kopa. Auspy ma se mi o, omo elomi ni kose! Majeobaje of Ile-Ekiti. Auspy wo lu, gbogbo olomoge le tiro. Omo tekun ba bi ekun naa ni yio jo!

This man, you got me laughing so hard..I had tears in my eyes.

Bia how far now? How for Vodka for early Russian mor-mor?

I have to say, Chief, thank you for the salutations! :lol:

Auspicious.

Prof Penkelemess
May 18, 2010, 06:42 AM
This is very IN-auspicious !

Nobody reakk to my BLACK foress offer:

why now ???

all you pipul no wan fine place for dis same germany,

wey dey divide big (and I mean: BIG one!) african real estate befoo.

make you go hurry kia-kia now-now befoo IBORI and IBB seff

go grab'em all.


Prof Penkele of Estate
em

DaBishop
May 18, 2010, 03:06 PM
Very engaging presentation...makes you think too...what to do about the judiciary and 'perpetual injunctions'...It gave me a idea too. Thanks.