Another newbie....

[omotekerebe]

....emm...i mean another JJC.
Omotekerebe, current location: US

As a true Bende girl, I bring kain-kain, kola, bitter kola, native kola and even alligator pepper for the village elders oh..I dey salute oh!

[Kenn]

Hmmm...abeg, make I first shine my eye with small kain-kain before the Visa people come.

Omo, make you no stand there dey look me O! Take some shot of ogogoro now O, because when this people start to grill you, no be ordinary eye you go take dey answer them O! No say I no want you O!

Anyway, if dem ask you for guarantor, give dem my name. You be good babe; I dey your back like backman!:D

Kenn (after downing three shots): Omotekerebe! Na where you get this kind ogogoro?This one na fire O! Abeg help me pour two bottles hide am for inside your wrapper before those elemu Elders reach here. Remember say me and you get agreement O! Oya, quick-quick, hide am make we dey wait!

[Abraxas]

Hi, Omotekerebe (JJC)!

Make I tell give yoo somet'ing: Yoo see, {ehne-en?}, me, I like de way wey yoo been take enter our village of no regret: our origin.

Now, de t'ing wey remain be sey, you will proceed to tell us more about yourself: that is the very essence of our visa review and interrogation protocol at the Village High Commission, located on the 500th floor, at the Village Twin Towers Complex, just by the Square.

We need to know you more, Omotekerebe (JJC). So, fire on, my pikin.

Muchas gracias.

Don Juan-Carlos ABRAXAS (III)
Village High Commissioner (Emeritus) & Life President, Village Elders' Forum (Bar & Discotheque)

[Count1]

Omoterekerebe,

ko yo!

Oba a to kpe e! (Ise).

Welcome to the village. What news do you bring of Benin? Had I known you were coming, I would have asked you to reach my uncle to tell him to make sacrifice to the ancestral shrine that this year's harvest may be great.

No harm. Welcome anyway. Better for you to come here than to go to Italy for holiday job.

Count 1

[denker]

welcome my luving sista, abeg o, me i dey drink only SHIRAZ...do not forget to include inside...merci!

[heart-thief]

Dudes take your time!:eek::p

Welcome newbie :shake:

[Miss Tee]

Welcome to the Village Omotekerebe, Hope your stay will be permanent with us :)....Abraxas Has my ligit entry been confirmed to your satisfaction or do you still need more time for confirmation :p:p:p

[omotekerebe]

Thank you everybody. I hope my stay will be permanent too oh......

Well....I found this site while searching for something totally unrelated.
After I read this phrase for the Welcome Committe Release;

There is no applicable excuse of ‘Stop it, I like it’ [/B]in NVS and assumptions must not be made if you see one NVS woman doing play-play with another NVS man. Go and find your own play-play.

I wan laff die and that's why I joined oh.

Omotekerebe needs to laff more jare.....what else?

My hobbies; abusing my co-workers with pidgin english; only say dem don dey start to understand small small, so maybe time for new hobby don reach.
I black, I short and I round.......hence the name!

I work in Healthcare Administration and I love kpokpo garri and roasted fish!

Make una give me visa oh abeg...because all this immigration and embassy matter don tire me sef.

[Miss Tee]

Omotekerebe in my own eyes you have passed and Visa should be given to you fast fast...But see eh let me not put mouth. One Arugbo Ojo is still on my case in this Village :rolleyes::D:D

[peterosa]

....emm...i mean another JJC.
Omotekerebe, current location: US

As a true Bende girl, I bring kain-kain, kola, bitter kola, native kola and even alligator pepper for the village elders oh..I dey salute oh!

You are wlcome to this great village of no regret and all your gift are accepted.

[omotekerebe]

Omoterekerebe,

ko yo!

Oba a to kpe e! (Ise).

Welcome to the village. What news do you bring of Benin? Had I known you were coming, I would have asked you to reach my uncle to tell him to make sacrifice to the ancestral shrine that this year's harvest may be great.

No harm. Welcome anyway. Better for you to come here than to go to Italy for holiday job.

Count 1

Ise ohhhh....
Anyway me I no know wetin dey happen for Benin oh...no be there I come from. :) I say I be Bende; I be Urhobo from Delta! But if you wan send message to your unlce I fit help you send am through Greener line or Delta line sha :D. No send jeans sha becase MOPO dey hold ppl wey carry jeans travel.

[Abraxas]

Hi, Director, Homeland Security & Chief of Staff, Due Process Office!

I take God beg una again, make una no vex~o, I beg-i, helep me confirm WELL-WELL weda Ms. Tee been REALLY undergo de usual visa review and interrogation protocol sef, when 'e been be JJC last year January.

Me, I no fit find 'inhm name for de data warehouse wey dey for de Database Administrator 'inhm office, wey dey for Basement Level 30, for de Village Twin Towers Complex (VTT), wey dey near de Main Square.

Muchas gracias.

Don Juan-Carlos ABRAXAS (III), alias Arugbo Ojo.
Village High Commissioner (Emeritus) & Life President, Village Elders' Forum (Bar & Discotheque)

[ikwerreman]

You guys have not processed my visa o.
How we go do am naaah?

[elgaxton]

Hi, Director, Homeland Security & Chief of Staff, Due Process Office!

I take God beg una again, make una no vex~o, I beg-i, helep me confirm WELL-WELL weda Ms. Tee been REALLY undergo de usual visa review and interrogation protocol sef, when 'e been be JJC last year January.

Me, I no fit find 'inhm name for de data warehouse wey dey for de Database Administrator 'inhm office, wey dey for Basement Level 30, for de Village Twin Towers Complex (VTT), wey dey near de Main Square.

Muchas gracias.

Don Juan-Carlos ABRAXAS (III), alias Arugbo Ojo.
Village High Commissioner (Emeritus) & Life President, Village Elders' Forum (Bar & Discotheque)

Oga Abraxas, I don find out o... this is her thread (http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com/forum/introductions/15894-hi.html)

E be liek her time na him, Ms Sandylomo go on break

[calist]

Omotekerebe in my own eyes you have passed and Visa should be given to you fast fast...But see eh let me not put mouth. One Arugbo Ojo is still on my case in this Village :rolleyes::D:D

Thanks Elgaxton (VHS NVS),

Thanks for reviving the thread. Well done; But please do keep an eye on the items brought forward by our jjc omotekerebe, information reaching my office is that a certain village is having a filled day with those item(s), in the fullness of time he will have to explain to the elders and member of the VTT his mission/objectives.

@ Miss T; its time to do the needful on your thread so that your visa can be approved. Thanks for your patience so far; I will have to include your name in the list for resilience villagers’ award; that would be after you have tendered a hand written apology to the Welcomer –in-Chief Abraxas. :biggrin:

All the best as I await your response

Calist
Chief of Staff

[calist]

You guys have not processed my visa o.
How we go do am naaah?

Not to worry, you kindly go back to your thread and continue responding to issues arising from your response so far until you obtain your visa; which you most as you refrain from welcoming other jjc until you obtain your visa. :biggrin:

A million thanks

Calist

[calist]

Hello Omoterekerebe,

Well done for finally talking the bold step by making the right decision to join our beloved village NVS on the cyber space. :)

You are not doing badly so far with your introduction. Thanks for the items you provided, but you will have to replace the missing one(s) :D

Blow are your visa interview questions, ensure to respond as truthfully and promptly as possible.
a)What do you do for a living
b) Where you born before, during or after the civil war?
c) Name 10 ailments jedi jedi mixture cures?
d) How do you intend to contribute to the betterment of we village?
e) Who dares wins true or false?
f) Provide 5 reasons on your take in (e)

I look forward to reading your responses and meeting you more on the square.

Good luck

Calist
Chief of Staff

[omotekerebe]

Hello Omoterekerebe,

Blow are your visa interview questions, ensure to respond as truthfully and promptly as possible.
a)What do you do for a living
b) Where you born before, during or after the civil war?
c) Name 10 ailments jedi jedi mixture cures?
d) How do you intend to contribute to the betterment of we village?
e) Who dares wins true or false?
f) Provide 5 reasons on your take in (e)

Chief of Staff

Thank you very mush.

a) I been answer that one before oh, but anyway, I work in Healthcare Admin.
b) After the civil war oh
c) which one be jedi jedi mixture???
d) me sef, i know small book, only small so if anybody talk something, me sef go put my own mouth inside....na una need to help me because I need to know about that Poverty Eradication bank....be like say my purse dey leak or something......:frown::confused:
e) Na false
f) (1) just because you try no mean say you go succeed, (2) no be everybody when "dare" their $1 or $2 naim dey win lottery. (3) if you go for interview, you dare, but e no mean say you go get the job. (4) nearly cannot kill a bird (5) all these kind things naim dey give ppl false courage, after them go say 'at least i try' whether you try or not no matter, if 2 people run, nobody dey remember the pesin wen take 2nd o....

Well...that's it o...my mind dey work different from other ppl own oh, so only God know whether the question wen dem ask me naim i answer.:razz: :biggrin:

[omotekerebe]

Not to worry, you kindly go back to your thread and continue responding to issues arising from your response so far until you obtain your visa; which you most as you refrain from welcoming other jjc until you obtain your visa. :biggrin:

A million thanks

Calist

I come fear as ikwereman come begin dey drag im visa matter inside my own thread oh...:D shuo!

[calist]

c) which one be jedi jedi mixture???

I hope say this question no be for any villager or jjc alike to answer, thing be say as a correct lady, you for take style ask for explaination or expo.:biggrin: by the way, no be for healthcare you dey work? Abeg answer question make man pikin follow you jolificate your visa celebration.



d) me sef, i know small book, only small so if anybody talk something, me sef go put my own mouth inside....na una need to help me because I need to know about that Poverty Eradication bank....be like say my purse dey leak or something......:frown::confused:

make you no worry, as for dat your leaking purse, Sura the tailor will gladly do justics to it; so that it will leak no more, besides you may not be needing the purse any more as soon as you obtain your visa cos its part of the packages that Poverty Eradication bank offers to successfull jjcs. Hope you are ready?:D



Well...that's it o...my mind dey work different from other ppl own oh, so only God know whether the question wen dem ask me naim i answer.:razz: :biggrin:

:clap::clap::clap: So far you are keeping it real. Keep it up, but before we move to the next phase, you will have to provide answer to the question (c)

All the best. :rose:

Calist
Chief Of Staff

[omotekerebe]

:clap::clap::clap: So far you are keeping it real. Keep it up, but before we move to the next phase, you will have to provide answer to the question (c)

All the best. :rose:

Calist
Chief Of Staff

My sister, it is not a small something oh...I be ordinary paperpusher for this healthcare business oh, I no be clinical staff.

I don do expo, shukuli, etc tire for secondary school so now wen I don repent, I no wan go back to my old ways...so I go try my best and leave the rest for God. Like Naija ppl say, 'it is well' :lol: So here goes;

c) if i remember correctly, jedi jedi mixture can cure ANY and ALL ailments that is if you believe all those guys wen dey sell am for danfo & molue. Constipation, diarrhea, menstrual pain, blocked intestine, twisted intestine, even if your intestine turn upside down:sick:, this mixture will cure it. You can even use it on ring worm, beri-beri and craw craw. Yes, a trial will convince you....

Oya, Calist, mark my paper and issue visa oh.........I don try!:clap:

[Abraxas]

Hi, my pikin, Ms. Omotekerebe (JJC)!

Make I helep yoo small-small with better exposition:

Both metaphorically and literally speaking, "je'di-je'di", when translated from the original Yoruba into colloquial Brokin, means "chop nyash-chop nyash", which, when translated into 21st century Queen's English, means "haemorrhoids" or "piles", {shey yoo get?}

Oya, I beg, fire on with de visa interrogation, o'jare. I done tyre for wait for de chopulation of de partykolas wey we go take wash down ya visa~o!

Hmmmmm.... Me, I done tell yoo my own finish. As dem been talk for olden days: Delay is dangerous!

Muchas gracias.

Don Juan-Carlos ABRAXAS (III)
Village High Commissioner & Life President, Village Elders' Forum (Bar & Discotheque)

[omotekerebe]

Oya[/B], I beg, fire on with de visa interrogation, o'jare. I done tyre for wait for de chopulation of de partykolas wey we go take wash down ya visa~o!

Hmmmmm.... Me, I done tell yoo my own finish. As dem been talk for olden days: Delay is dangerous!

Muchas gracias.

Don Juan-Carlos ABRAXAS (III)
Village High Commissioner & Life President, Village Elders' Forum (Bar & Discotheque)[/COLOR]

Me I don answer the one wey I sabi finish oh. Wetin dey again?

[E_Pluribus_Unum]

another one hooked,

see our site tapp gaaan!!!!

NVS ROCKS!!!!!

[calist]

Hi Omotekerebe,

Welcome to the final stage of your Visa Interview process. I hope you wallet is loaded and that you are equal to the task?

Please find below, the "Partikolas" that you must present to the Village elders before your Visa will be approved.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The List:

(1) One basket of GENUINE Igboid kola nuts (oji Igbo)

(2) One basket of Arewaesque kola nuts (goro/gworo).

(3) One tiny teaspoon (5ml. max) of superbly chilled, pasteurized kunu (without this, you file remains open)

(4) 10 x 50 litres jerry-cans of palmie (pasteurized palm wine powerless).

(5) Isi ewu (with 2 eyes, 1 tongue, and 2 ears per goat head)

(6) Unlimited suyarized and tenderized beef and pork barbeque (for all Villagers and JJCs).

(7) Roasted cocoyam to serve 50 seasoned elders (maximum).

(8) Nigerian omelet (for 50 seasoned elders only.)

(9) 2 crates of Hennessey XO champagne brandy, for His Excellency, Oga Big-K.

(10) 13 crates of Dom Perignon (for 13 very seasoned, kunu-allergic elders).

(11) 100 strings of Jigida beads for the women

(12) 50 tins of Saturday Night powder

(13) 20 wraps of eko (for the toothless elders)

(14) Spicy goatmeat peppersoup

(15) 30 crates of Crush & Mirinda Orange

(16) 50 cartons of Guiness Odeku

(17) 30 cartons of Malta Guiness

(18) 15 bowls of freshly ground Lahli (African tatoo)---reserved for Chairperson, Board of Trustees (JJCAMB)

(19) 150 miniature jars of Tiro (African eyeliner)---reserved for the Chairperson, Board of Trustees(JJCAMB)

(20) 2 drums x 250 litres of high octane triple-distilled GENUINE 100 degrees proof ogogoro.

(21) Highly pepperized fresh fish pepper soup to serve all Villagers, JJCs, and their guests, including gatecrashers present.

(22) 50 plates of Salade Du Nigeriana (i.e. Ugba + okporoko, garnished with uziza/uda puree) for placating the hard-liners and hawks of the Elders' Forum.

(23) Unlimited supply of bitter kola, alligator pepper, and garden egg.

(24) 50 Coolers of Steaming hot Ajinomotoless jollof rice.

(25) 10 x 100 litres jerry-cans of superbly chilled, pasteurized kunu.

(26) 12 coolers of plantain pottage

(27) 25 foil pans of pepperized snail (exclusively reserved for the women)

(28) One dozen, full sheet, Birthday cakes (fondant icing)

(29) 500 Goodie bags

(30) 1 sackload of killishi

(31) 1 sackload of kulinkuli

(32) 10 Tins of Ijebu garri



Simply make sure that the above list is included in your next post, thereafter, I will forward a final reccomendation to the Welcomer-In-Chief to approve your Visa request.

Remmember: Dont keep the elders waiting o! :)

[omotekerebe]

Ok...I don come back from ATM and market....chei the list plenty no be small. I been dey complain say my bag de leak, this one pass bag leakage oh....... :rolleyes: :)

I hereby summiitt my partikolas for inspection. Thank you!! :hail:

(1) One basket of GENUINE Igboid kola nuts (oji Igbo)

(2) One basket of Arewaesque kola nuts (goro/gworo).

(3) One tiny teaspoon (5ml. max) of superbly chilled, pasteurized kunu (without this, you file remains open)

(4) 10 x 50 litres jerry-cans of palmie (pasteurized palm wine powerless).

(5) Isi ewu (with 2 eyes, 1 tongue, and 2 ears per goat head)

(6) Unlimited suyarized and tenderized beef and pork barbeque (for all Villagers and JJCs).

(7) Roasted cocoyam to serve 50 seasoned elders (maximum).

(8) Nigerian omelet (for 50 seasoned elders only.)

(9) 2 crates of Hennessey XO champagne brandy, for His Excellency, Oga Big-K.

(10) 13 crates of Dom Perignon (for 13 very seasoned, kunu-allergic elders).

(11) 100 strings of Jigida beads for the women

(12) 50 tins of Saturday Night powder

(13) 20 wraps of eko (for the toothless elders)

(14) Spicy goatmeat peppersoup

(15) 30 crates of Crush & Mirinda Orange

(16) 50 cartons of Guiness Odeku

(17) 30 cartons of Malta Guiness

(18) 15 bowls of freshly ground Lahli (African tatoo)---reserved for Chairperson, Board of Trustees (JJCAMB)

(19) 150 miniature jars of Tiro (African eyeliner)---reserved for the Chairperson, Board of Trustees(JJCAMB)

(20) 2 drums x 250 litres of high octane triple-distilled GENUINE 100 degrees proof ogogoro.

(21) Highly pepperized fresh fish pepper soup to serve all Villagers, JJCs, and their guests, including gatecrashers present.

(22) 50 plates of Salade Du Nigeriana (i.e. Ugba + okporoko, garnished with uziza/uda puree) for placating the hard-liners and hawks of the Elders' Forum.

(23) Unlimited supply of bitter kola, alligator pepper, and garden egg.

(24) 50 Coolers of Steaming hot Ajinomotoless jollof rice.

(25) 10 x 100 litres jerry-cans of superbly chilled, pasteurized kunu.

(26) 12 coolers of plantain pottage

(27) 25 foil pans of pepperized snail (exclusively reserved for the women)

(28) One dozen, full sheet, Birthday cakes (fondant icing)

(29) 500 Goodie bags

(30) 1 sackload of killishi

(31) 1 sackload of kulinkuli

(32) 10 Tins of Ijebu garri

[emj]

....emm...i mean another JJC.
Omotekerebe, current location: US

As a true Bende girl, I bring kain-kain, kola, bitter kola, native kola and even alligator pepper for the village elders oh..I dey salute oh!

Eherm welcome to our village of no regrets Omo:p


EMJ
Chairperson Board of Trustees JJcamb

[calist]

Village High Commissioner
Don Juan-Carlos ABRAXAS (III)

This is presenting the jjc omotekerebe She has finally answered all questions thus succeeded in both phases of due process and with the best of her ability provided the required items.

Kindly grant her the Ogbonge visa to this we village of no regrets.

Calist
Chief of Staff

[omotekerebe]

:hail::hail:
:D:D:D

Wo mi na, bi mo tiun fẹgbẹ yin Baba

:D

[omaks]

Ok...I don come back from ATM and market....chei the list plenty no be small. I been dey complain say my bag de leak, this one pass bag leakage oh....... :rolleyes: :)

I hereby summiitt my partikolas for inspection. Thank you!! :hail:

(1) One basket of GENUINE Igboid kola nuts (oji Igbo)

(2) One basket of Arewaesque kola nuts (goro/gworo).

(3) One tiny teaspoon (5ml. max) of superbly chilled, pasteurized kunu (without this, you file remains open)

(4) 10 x 50 litres jerry-cans of palmie (pasteurized palm wine powerless).

(5) Isi ewu (with 2 eyes, 1 tongue, and 2 ears per goat head)

(6) Unlimited suyarized and tenderized beef and pork barbeque (for all Villagers and JJCs).

(7) Roasted cocoyam to serve 50 seasoned elders (maximum).

(8) Nigerian omelet (for 50 seasoned elders only.)

(9) 2 crates of Hennessey XO champagne brandy, for His Excellency, Oga Big-K.

(10) 13 crates of Dom Perignon (for 13 very seasoned, kunu-allergic elders).

(11) 100 strings of Jigida beads for the women

(12) 50 tins of Saturday Night powder

(13) 20 wraps of eko (for the toothless elders)

(14) Spicy goatmeat peppersoup

(15) 30 crates of Crush & Mirinda Orange

(16) 50 cartons of Guiness Odeku

(17) 30 cartons of Malta Guiness

(18) 15 bowls of freshly ground Lahli (African tatoo)---reserved for Chairperson, Board of Trustees (JJCAMB)

(19) 150 miniature jars of Tiro (African eyeliner)---reserved for the Chairperson, Board of Trustees(JJCAMB)

(20) 2 drums x 250 litres of high octane triple-distilled GENUINE 100 degrees proof ogogoro.

(21) Highly pepperized fresh fish pepper soup to serve all Villagers, JJCs, and their guests, including gatecrashers present.

(22) 50 plates of Salade Du Nigeriana (i.e. Ugba + okporoko, garnished with uziza/uda puree) for placating the hard-liners and hawks of the Elders' Forum.

(23) Unlimited supply of bitter kola, alligator pepper, and garden egg.

(24) 50 Coolers of Steaming hot Ajinomotoless jollof rice.

(25) 10 x 100 litres jerry-cans of superbly chilled, pasteurized kunu.

(26) 12 coolers of plantain pottage

(27) 25 foil pans of pepperized snail (exclusively reserved for the women)

(28) One dozen, full sheet, Birthday cakes (fondant icing)

(29) 500 Goodie bags

(30) 1 sackload of killishi

(31) 1 sackload of kulinkuli

(32) 10 Tins of Ijebu garri

I nor know maybe na me o, but did i just see you roll ya eyes? Upon all da millions wey Health Admin job dey give you, ordinary 32 items na im dem ask make you submit you dey roll eyes. Abi na Kredit krunch dey cause am? Anyway, no worry, by the time the whole villagers welcome you with plenti - plenti love, you go know say it is worth all the expenditure. Welcome my sista to awa vilage of no regret.:D:D

[Abraxas]

The Village High Commission




500th Floor, The Twin Tower Complex, The Square NV1SQ, Cyberspace.



Official Website: http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com



Reference: VTT/VHC/JJCAMB/OM.9.002.Cap 30/27 Vol.4Q./72621338/APPDX. LXXVIX (M)

Date: Friday, 27 March 2009.


Hi, Omotekerebe (JJC)!

Congratulations!

Two (2) solid GBOZAs to you for voluntarily minimizing your ego, for conducting yourself well, and successfully completing your visa interview.

And so, by the powers conferred upon me, on behalf of all Villagers and JJCs, I do hereby cordially, and very wholeheartedly, welcome you on board the Nigerian Village Square, the flagship of Nigeria in cyberspace, as a fully authenticated citizen of this Village.

We also expect that you show some level-headedness, objectivity, consistency, maturity, and good interpersonal skills in your interactions with others, whenever YOU are on the Square.
Once more, welcome on board the Nigerian Village Square, the default home page of the Nigerian cyber-literati, worldwide.



http://i259.photobucket.com/albums/hh294/Komsykomsa/SealofthePresidentofNigeria.jpgTEMPORARY TRANSIT VISA APPROVED.http://i259.photobucket.com/albums/hh294/Komsykomsa/SealofthePresidentofNigeria.jpg



Muchas gracias.

Don Juan-Carlos ABRAXAS (III).
(a.k.a. His Eminence, Sheikh Sadiqq d’Fuqkk of Sakkwato Khalifate, Darfur & Dubai Emirates)
Village High Commissioner Emeritus & Life President, Elders’ Forum (Bar & Discotheque)

cc: Department of Miscellaneous What-not-isms, Office of His Excellency, Oga Big-K (The Penthouse, 555th Floor)
cc: Chairperson, Board of Trustees & CEO, JJC Admission Matters Bureau (500th Floor)
cc: Special Executive Adviser, SExA, JJCAMB. (500th Floor).
cc: Chief of Staff to the CEO. (450th Floor)
cc: Database Administrator, DA. (Basement Level 30)
cc: Director, Village Homeland Security Department (DD-VHS), (250th Floor)
cc: Chief of Staff Due Process Office, COS-DPO. (440th Floor)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

APPENDIX 1:

Revised Standard Version (RSV) translated from the Original Brokin Edition (OBE) of the Gospel according to Apostle (General) Okikiolakan Oni’ranu Olusegun Igbochukwu Aremu Matthew Obasanjo (JP), a very randy former military despot, and the incumbent Balogun of Abule-Obo.

Story, story , (story). Once upon a time, (time, time!):
And so, it came to pass that, in the good old olden days, in ancient Ikoyi, a little old oyibo lady, well into her late eighties, slowly entered the front door of an erotic sex shop near the colonial Governor General’s residence. Obviously very unstable on her feet, she shakily hobbled across the store to the counter.

Finally arriving at the counter and grabbing it for support, she asked the Nigerian cashier: "D-d-d-do you-u-u-u h-h-have vib-b-b-b-b-b—b-rators?"

The cashier, politely trying not to burst out laughing, replied: "Yes, Ma, we do have vibrators. Actually we carry many models, Ma."

The old woman then asked: "D-d-d-d-do y-y-you-u-u-u have a p-p-pink-k one, t-t-ten-n inches-s l-l-long-g-g, a-a-and-d a-about-t t-t-two-o inches-s-s th-th-thick-k-k?"

The cashier responded, "Yes Ma, we do".

"C-c-c-c-c-can-n-n-n y-y-y-you-u-u-u t-t-tell- m-m-m-me how-w-w-w t-t-t-to t-t-turn t-t-the fuucccckkkkinggg t-t-thing-g-g-g off-f-f-f-f?"


That is the end of my first story for today.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
APPENDIX 2:

Revised Standard Version (RSV) translated from the Original Brokin Edition (OBE) of the Holy Book of Psychedelic Lies according to General Overseer Ibrahim Gbadamosi (Evil Spirit) Babangida (GCFR).

Story, story , (story). Once upon a time, (time, time!):
And so, it came to pass that, in the good old olden days, in ancient Aba (Eyimba City), a primary school teacher explained to her class that she was a Liverpool fan.

She asked her students to raise their hands if they too were Liverpool fans.


Everyone in the class raised their hand except one little girl.

The teacher looked at the girl with surprise and said:

“Mary, why didn't you raise your hand?”

“Because I'm not a Liverpool fan,” she replied.

The teacher, still shocked, asked:

“Well, if you are not a Liverpool fan, then who are you a fan of?”

“I am a Manchester United fan, and proud of it,” Mary replied.

The teacher could not believe her ears. “Mary, why, please tell, are you a Manchester United fan?”

“Because my mum is a Manchester United fan, and my dad is a Manchester United fan, so I'm a Manchester United fan too!”

“Well,” said the teacher in an obviously annoyed tone, “that is no reason for you to be a Manchester United fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time.. What if your mum was a prostitute and your dad was a drug addict, what would you be then?”

“Then,” Mary smiled, “I'd be a Liverpool fan.”

That is the end of my second and final story for today.

[calist]

:hail::hail:
:D:D:D

Wo mi na, bi mo tiun fẹgbẹ yin Baba

:D

I know the joy that comes with visa approval, but know it that the approved/offical languages in this we village of no regrets :biggrin: is/are English and Pidgin any other language when used "MUST" be translated to the approved/offical language(s)

Thank you as you have a wonderful celebration. :shake:

Calist
Chief of Staff

[omotekerebe]

I know the joy that comes with visa approval, but know it that the approved/offical languages in this we village of no regrets :biggrin: is/are English and Pidgin any other language when used "MUST" be translated to the approved/offical language(s)

Thank you as you have a wonderful celebration. :shake:

Calist
Chief of Staff

Wo mi na, bi mo tiun fẹgbẹ yin Baba
Look @ me as I praise our father in a dance ooooooooo

:D