For love or paper?

[Anonymous Villager]

Hello Villagers,

I have a dilemma. I am been seeing this guy for 2 years and all, everything is going well, but we have a serious issue. We are both abroad, and don't have our pali, we have been recently talking about it, and think it is best we break up ( i think we both love each other, at least we portray and profess it, but whats love got to do with it?).

He suggest that we should both go find alternate solutions to our problems and maybe reconnect later, sound like the wisest thing to do for now.

My fear is that, it will be easier for him as a guy to resolve his issue (i think), but how do I go about this?

I am confused, and I know the hassle I have been thru being iweless

[Anonymous Villager]

What is your problem? How to keep the guy or how to get paper?

[Soul Sista]

I don't understand. What is your palava exactly? Break it down a bit more, please.

[Anonymous Villager]

What is the palava? To be honest, I am not sure. I guess I am afraid of the unknown.

Where do I start from, I am alone here. I really am not after keeping the relationship, we both have to move on, we were hoping that the lottery would come thru, but not willing to keep hoping on that.

I feel I am holding him back, with my needy and clingy attitude, and I feel he does not want me to feel he is abandoning me .

I am sad because I am very limited as to what I can do and be. Things are hard. I am considering going back home ( I will give it unit the end of the year)

Just offloading my soul.

[katampe]

Originally Posted by Anonymous Villager

Hello Villagers,

I have a dilemma. I am been seeing this guy for 2 years and all, everything is going well, but we have a serious issue. We are both abroad, and don't have our pali, we have been recently talking about it, and think it is best we break up ( i think we both love each other, at least we portray and profess it, but whats love got to do with it?).

He suggest that we should both go find alternate solutions to our problems and maybe reconnect later, sound like the wisest thing to do for now.

I am confused, and I know the hassle I have been thru being iweless

I am not sure what is hard to understand here. The mama is sad and suspects she might have lost an opportunity to date and have someone she loves since it appears harder for women to get sorted out with pali like men.

So what she asks is, how does she go about resolving pali problem being a woman, and with the hope that she needs to resolve it faster before the man so she can go pick up their relationship where it left from?

Soul is that too hard to understand? Abi, you are too up intellectually, emotionally, socially and legally that you can't connect with the reality that Nigerian women face this dilemma, and not everyone is a legal immigrant?

[Anonymous Villager]

Mama find an oyibo and marry and you are sorted. That is what your boyfriend would most likely do. Though his arrangee marrige to a black or white american may cost him some money and also time. If you play your cards well, you may actually get settlement, some mulattos and child support. Na your call.

[Anonymous Villager]

ThANKS KATAMPE YOU SUMMARIZED IT WELL.

[Soul Sista]

Nonee:

Pele (sorry) o.

I am sorry. You are not the first person to find yourself in this type of situation. So, don't despair because there is nothing new under the sun.

Have you seen immigration counsel in the country where you live? S/he might be able to help you by giving you advice/information to better manage the unknown. There might be issues that you have not considered.

Is there any possibility that you can go back to school?

You seem resigned to nothing good coming out of the situation. Have you prayed about it?

Do you have a Plan B of what to do if you have to go back to Naija?

I know many people do illegal stuff with immigration matters. I won't advise you to do anything that you know is illegal.

Good luck!

Soul Sista a/k/a Soul Sizzling
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Originally Posted by katampe

* * *

Soul is that too hard to understand? Abi, you are too up intellectually, emotionally, socially and legally that you can't connect with the reality that Nigerian women face this dilemma, and not everyone is a legal immigrant?

Katampe:

I did not know you were a psychiatrist to get into my brain. Even the woman I asked the question answered me, what is your buisness? S'abojo ore oninawo (busy body, i too know)!

I think you are back abi? I thought you had cleansed your system of the chip that always keeps attacking Soul Sista. You are back? Okay, no problem.

Soul Sista a/k/a Soul Sizzling

[katampe]

Katampe:

I did not know you were a psychiatrist to get into my brain. Even the woman I asked the question answered me, what is your buisness? S'abojo ore oninawo (busy body, i too know)!

I think you are back abi? I thought you had cleansed your system of the chip that always keeps attacking Soul Sista. You are back? Okay, no problem.

Soul Sista a/k/a Soul Sizzling

Back, nbo ? I beg commot for road.

You know I have never gotten you off my radar, you are too amazing and a very special woman not to hold my gaze. But sometimes your grammar is just too much for me that it borders on eccentricity. Reality is what is needed please!

[Soul Sista]

Originally Posted by katampe

Back, nbo ? I beg commot for road.

You know I have never gotten you off my radar, you are too amazing and a very special woman not to hold my gaze. But sometimes your grammar is just too much for me that it borders on eccentricity. Reality is what is needed please!

Katampe:

May be I am an eccentric! Have you considered that? In any case, how does it take even 2 Kobo from you?

Okay, please, leave me alone. Is that good enough?

Sotan aboku (Finish, abi)?

Leave me!

Soul Sista a/k/a Soul Sizzling