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I remember a course mate of mine some years ago. He was an honest and a very religious young man. I knew him very well, so I could tell that his chances of being truthful could conservatively be 99 in 100 cases. But that one chance of being a little dishonest came towards the end of our programme in the university.
He was doing his final year research project and his topic had something to do with prostitutes in
Lagos
. It was a particularly difficult topic for him to handle because, in spite of his chastity, he had to mingle with some prostitutes in order to administer questionnaires and possibly personally talk to a few of them.
As I walked into his room one morning, he cut the picture of a very sad man.
What is the problem? I asked him.
My brother, he said, please sit down.
I did.
What is the problem? I repeated.
Well, I have a confession to make.
A confession?
Yes, a confession! I have been on this project for some time and I am already getting frustrated. I have been having problems reaching my sample population. Now I have decided to complete the project as soon as possible and get out of here.
My thoughts went haywire. What was he up to? He definitely was not going ask me to help him interview some women of easy virtue. No, that would be against my personal resolve. He was not going to give in to their demands, either, just to be able to complete his project. No, he was too principled for that. Or has he already given in? Not likely! So what was he driving at?
What do you want to do now? I asked.
Well, I have already told God that one of these questionnaires is representing ten people. I just wanted to confess to somebody so that no one will say I have committed a sin.
My head spun! Counselling? No, that was not what he needed. He just wanted me to be aware. I thought I should give him a piece of advice, but what was I to advise him to do? It would be good to send someone who did not mind, but where was the money to pay him? And he did not have all the time on his hands.
If I could not help him, I decided I should keep my sermon for another person who was not so desperate. You know, there are just some situations where sermonising is not the solution to the persons problem. One questionnaire representing ten prostitutes! This is a serious ethical issue in research. For students, maybe it is not so serious. I bet he could not put what he wanted to do at the end of his report. If he did, it would read something like: One questionnaire represented ten prostitutes in this study. Further studies are therefore required to prove that one questionnaire actually represented ten people.
As I mused over this incident last night, which by the way happened over ten years ago, I saw vividly one thing the Independent National Electoral Commission (INEC) did not do right in last Saturdays elections. It should have indicated on the ballot papers or result sheets how many people a vote for the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) represented. I honestly do not want to make light such a serious issue, but I suppose it would have helped. If we had known ahead of time how may people each vote cast in favour of PDP represented, we would have all voted and gone back home, satisfied that the electoral process was not shrouded in secrecy. A lot of violence could have been averted as the announced results would have been acceptable to all.
In
Enugu
State
, for example, the Senate President would have known that one vote for PDP represented at least 100 people. So, irrespective of how many people voted when the polling booths were opened at 3.00pm, it would have been accepted that every voter in
Enugu
was represented by the few votes that were cast before dusk. It would then have been absolutely unnecessary for Ken Nnamani to swear on the graves of his forefathers that even the father of the Information Minister did not vote, contrary to the young mans claims that the old man was the first person to cast his vote in his village. The explanation would have just been that the old mans vote was tucked in somewhere between one and 100, which represented each vote cast for PDP.
In
Rivers
State
where mischief makers are claiming that the elections could not have witnessed 100 percent turnout, the scaling factor (as the West African Examinations Council or Joint Admissions and Matriculation Board would call it) could have been one PDP vote representing four people. All you needed to do then would have been to divide the total votes scored by four or whatever to know the number of people that actually voted.
Going to
Ondo
State
, the women who have been walking the streets naked (is it half-naked?), protesting the announcement of fictitious results by INEC should have known ahead of time that their common will is always intact. The only little problem would have been that for the purpose of perpetuating the good leadership PDP had provided in the state, the demand in civilised societies of one man (or woman), one vote had to be altered to be one PDP vote representing five people. That would have convinced the women, whose husbands must be really angry by now that their wives have exposed their secret places in public, that for the purpose of equity the contents of the 20 or so boxes reportedly stolen by their Deputy Governor were counted as one vote representing one person. And that should have been accepted by all as enough punishment for PDP. Or why should people be overly harsh on the party for such a common thing as stealing ballot boxes.
As we look ahead to the presidential and national assembly elections this Saturday, may I implore INEC to be proactive by letting the people know in advance how many people a vote for PDP represents in all the states of the federation. Nobody is advocating that it should be the same everywhere. That would be unfair to even PDP. It can be as low as one vote representing two people, where PDP has strong support, or as high as one vote representing 200 people anywhere the party had a poor showing in last Saturdays elections. And if it is too late to include the information on the ballot papers or result sheets, posters should be printed and pasted at all polling booths so that the opposition will know what they are up against. Better still, INEC can use its goodwill to get free spaces and airtime in various media ahead of time to publicise the scaling factors. That way, nobody will accuse INEC of not being fair or transparent.

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Posted by Robot| 18.04.2007 09:36