If a bureaucrat becomes difficult or “unreasonable” or both, one often goes over his head, to his political boss if one is so connected and so disposed. Such practice is not local to Nigeria ; it is a common occurrence all over the world. It becomes even easier, if the bureaucrat, in question, does not have the immediate ear of his political boss, as in the case of our own “solution.”  Soludo, however, is big enough to accept what happened; after all, he used to keep his own lips close to Obasanjo’s ears when he too was an adviser. Moreover, the Attorney General of the Federation (AGF), Soludo’s political boss’ chief legal adviser, that announced the suspension of Soludo’s redenomination of the naira, was himself also not voted for: he must have been recommended to his position by a godfather. There is nothing outside “the rule of law” in that arrangement. The phrase, the rule of law, nevertheless, has emerged prominent in recent times. But, the rule of which law – is it the written or the unwritten law?

Britain , we are told has an unwritten constitution and Nigeria has a written one, but Nigeria has always practiced an unwritten constitution. For instance, our constitution as we speak has no role for our enviable traditional fathers. Yet, peace, tranquillity and security are maintained in our lands through the fatherly efforts of our traditional fathers. That is outside the rule of law. How are they supposed to be adequately recompensed for their efforts? The constitution has no provisions for that. President Yar’adua, in any case, has promised to find a role for them: until the constitution is amended, it will be outside the rule of law. The absence of provisions for such roles in our constitution encourages the movements of Ghana-must-go bags. Those will tantamount to illegal earning that would need to be laundered. It is not only our traditional leaders that have no constitutional role, various warlords or garrison commanders, if you like, in our cities and towns, who are helping to maintain peace and order also have no constitutional provisions. Recently, one of such garrison commanders, openly unabashed, demanded half of a governor’s security vote with little regards to “the rule of law.” He reasoned he was the chief security officer of the city.

Soludo, it seems, is politically ignorant: he thought he could force the issue of redesigning the currency by first bringing it to the public. He was wrong. Nigeria is on another planet and he should know it now, if he did not realise it before. He too did not come clean, because the motive was suspect. Thus, he lost the sympathy of whose interest he was protecting - the average Nigerian and, therefore, lost the argument. I tried regression analysis: supposing, the Central Bank wanted to fight the menace of money laundering. After what happened to Tarfa Balogun, the disgraced former Inspector General of Police (IG), only the most stupid, insane, money bag will carry “Ghana-must-go” bag to the bank. For some time now, the “exchange rate” of the naira has remained steady without increase in our economic productive activity. Yet, the Ghana-must-go bags are still moving. In the past, their contents were easily converted to foreign currencies and capital flown, thereby putting pressure on the naira. But vigilance by both EFCC and some co-operating foreign governments has curtailed that. Does it mean that that type of money laundering has been eradicated?

Money laundering, as an expression, was first used in legal term in 1982 in the United States of America . It was coined from Mafias’ widespread ownership of Laundromats in the USA . Gangsters, who then were earning huge sums in cash from prostitution, extortion, bootlegging and gambling, were required to show their legitimate source of income by the authority. One of the ways the gangsters achieved this was to buy into legitimate cash flow businesses, such as Laundromat business, and mingle their illicit earnings with the legit. Money laundering poses a threat to the international banking system and financial institutions: for that, the Central Bank ought to be concerned. In Nigeria, our own “mafias” do not make their illegal cash earnings from prostitution, gambling or bootlegging, maybe extortion, political influence peddling, lobbying or outside the rule of law payment. It is a known fact that Abuja and most state’s capitals do not sleep, simply because of movements of Ghana-must-go bags at night. However, banks do not get to see those bags any longer. So, where have all the Ghana-must-go bags gone?

When the late Governor Mumuni of Plateau State died in an air crash while the plane he was on was trying to land at the Jos Airport , billions of naira was discovered in the cellar of his abode. The money was evacuated by the order of the late dictator, General Abatcha. It was reported it took four lorry loads to ferry the loot. Using cellars as money vaults have since gone into disuse and probably out of fashion, particularly with Nuhu’s EFCC sniffing around. The in thing now is to have an underground vault in your house. If you ever wonder where the Ghana-must-go bags have gone, since the banks say they have not being seeing any, the underground personal cash vault is one possible destination. This is not the safe you and I expect in private houses; no, these are gigantic “ Fort Knots .” What Soludo was suggesting would have threatened the contents of these private cash vaults scattered all over the country. A redesigned naira would have turned over 90% of the contents of these private cash vaults into toilet paper, since they would be forced into the open. There would have been political and economic turmoil in the land.

Politicians and their godfathers know that such move would have ignited a chain of events, the end of which, according to the elder statesman, Enahoro, nobody will be able to conjecture. The first reaction could be finding ways to convert the old notes to the proposed new ones, and with EFCC waiting at the banks, there could be something close to war. Who really wants such development? Most Nigerians will find it hard, as I do, to settle for the destabilisation of the nation just because of a redesigned naira. Most Nigerians will rather settle for the bunkum excuse of lack of hyperinflation to warrant redenomination. Most religious organisations that enjoy some tithes from these vaults are also praying hard that Soludo’s solution remains permanently suspended. Besides, many Nigerians collect their doles (social security payments) from these private vaults since the government does not have such arrangements. How do you pay for security and tranquillity in the land? The extended family culture as we know it would have come to an abrupt end. Economically, there could be a run for all available convertible currencies in Nigeria and the value of the naira could plummet. It could be the end of Ghana-must-go bags as we know it, but we have come to like those bags. Under-the-table cash dealings would now go inside a mere envelope, because they would have removed some zeros. No, aba, no O! Soludo, please find another acceptable solution.

Samuel Akinyele Caulcrick, the author of The Devil Must Be Laughing.

Robot  Villager

# 1 If a bureaucrat becomes difficult or “unreasonable” or both, one often goes over his he...Read the full article. Posted by Robot| 15.10.2007 06:49

Toku.A  Villager

# 2 Well I will tell you where the last Ghana must go bags went. They bought shares in the Banks. Why do you think FCMB and co are always having one or the other capital raising offers or the other (shares) . Posted by Toku.A| 15.10.2007 11:26