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I was away to South Africa, Senegal and Ghana on a five weeks summer vacation. I spent week six in Nigeria where I met up with Vice President Goodluck Jonathan and with the Bayelsa State Governor, Timipre Sylva. The meeting and the interview with Goodluck took place on Friday August 20, 2008 at the Niicoon Hilyton Hotel, Abuja at 2pm; while the interview with Timipre Sylva took place on Sunday August 24, 2008 also at the Hilyton at 4pm. I am still in Abuja and will arrive The Common Wealth of Washington State on Wednesday August 2, 2008 at10:30pm:
Sabella: Mr. Vice President thanks a lot for agreeing to this interview. It is such a privilege and an honor to be with you today. Thank you
Jonathan G: You are welcome. I am happy to be here with you. It is my hope that with this interview people will have a better understanding of me and for what I stand for, i.e. my core values, worldview and things like that. At this point in time, my own people have an unfavorable perception of the kind of man I am. Journalists like you should write positive things, instead of writing speculative stories that lack substance and common sense.
Sabella: Your Excellency, in your well-thought out opinion, how do you think the Ijaws can move out and move beyond poverty, fetidity and hopelessness; how can they achieve development?
Jonathan G: The Ijaws can move out of poverty whenever they are ready to move out of poverty. They can farm and fish and sell Ogogoro. What else do they need to achieve development? All the talk I hear about ecological disaster is nothing but crap. Let them go about their farming and fishing endeavors.
Sabella (cuts in): What about education, availability of infrastructures, the right public policies, etc, etc.
Jonathan G: No, no, no the Ijaws don’t need things like that. You are going to be destabilizing their community when you bring in things like that. Besides, it is way too expensive to put such things together. It better we concentrate on developing the whole country instead of just a section.
Sabella: Your Excellency…Sir…Are you saying…
Jonathan G: (cuts in)… The oil and gas does not belong to the Ijaw or the Niger Delta. The oil flows from the North, from the Chad basin, from Sokoto and the Sahara Dessert. It is just by the grace of Allah that the liquid got deposited in the Niger Delta. In order words, you people are just temporary custodians of the oil and gas. Move on…moving on…
Sabella: Your journey so far, from DG to VP…Isn’t that Chief Obasanjo’s doing?
Jonathan G: Believe it or not, I was chosen by God almighty; he only used OBJ to manifest his will. He made it possible for me to become the deputy governor, and later the governor. And through his intervention, I am now the VP. Thank God for such mercies! And so I am only accountable to God and his angels, not mere mortals like Obasanjo.
Sabella: How is your relationship with President Yar’Adua?
Jonathan G: I am a simple man; I make no wahala and I make no shakara or gragra like Abubakar Atiku was doing to Obasanjo. I am a simple and gentle man. I am good at taking orders. Do you want me to jump up now? How high?
Sabella: No worry, sir; take am jeje and take am pelepele. Regarding the issue of development…
Jonathan G: Yea, yea, yea… The Niger Delta and Bayelsa State will move forward and achieve greater development among the comity of nations if they will encourage one another instead of dwelling on the current attitude of pull-him-down syndrome. Encouragement is what is needed: encouragement, prayers, fasting, that sort of things. They should keep praying to God to deliver them. What’s the need for all those militant activities; what’s the need criticizing me; what’s the need sending petition to government; and what’s the need taking up arms. Let them go on their knees and pray to God almighty.
Sabella: So, the Ijaws has been trying to pull you down? What about Governor Sylva and his henchmen?
Jonathan G: Oh yea, without a doubt! They don’t like me, they don’t respect me, they don’t fear me; and they have taken all and every opportunity to sell me short before the Nigerian people. They are accusing me of mismanagement and other corrupt practices. Whatever they are accusing me of is all lies, fabrications. I did not steal anything. As for that boy called Timipre Sylva, well, God dey; we shall see as 2011 is just by the corner…
Sabella: Your Excellency, you mean you didn’t steal their money? And can you categorical say you don’t have bank accounts in South Africa, Ghana, the US and UK and other places?
Jonathan G: I was the governor; therefore, I was the government. Government’s business was my business and my concern, and whatever I used the money for was for the good of the people. I kept bags of dollars, pounds, Euros and yen in my house in case any of my subjects needed money. It is their money not mine, I was merely the custodian of such money. Something else: people accused my wife of stealing. No; she did not! She is only keeping the people’s money for future use… Move on…moving on…
Sabella: What do you have to say about all the killings and kidnappings and the fact that some Ghana-Must-Go got burnt the last time your home was attacked?
Jonathan G: Well, I don’t want to say much about the kidnappings. Let’s leave that matter alone since I still have relatives in my village and I don’t want them kidnapped. I wouldn’t want them kidnapped. The kidnappers are responsible for the underdevelopment of the Niger Delta. Once the kidnappings stop, there will be progress. What is Ghana-Must-Go? I have never heard of that word before. Never!
Sabella: In what ways has your people gained from the oil and the federal government?
Jonathan Goodluck: Thanks for asking such a beautiful and deep question. That’s brilliant and wonderful. Let me ask you something: what else does the Ijaws want? After all, for the past eight years, Bayelsa had been getting the best from the Federal Government. For instance, within the past eight years the state had had the privilege of having ministers besides other political positions at the national level. There are Bayelsans who are ministers, chairs of different parastatals, ambassadors and so on and so forth. Isn’t that enough? Look, they should be grateful to the Federal Government and to God for those appointments. Look at me; I am by the grace of God the VP. That alone should be enough for the Ijaws. That’s enough!
Sabella: It is said that you don’t take kindly to criticisms. Is that true?
Jonathan G: Fuck you! That’s not true, that’s false. You see, anyone can criticize me, anyone can advise me. However, they must do so in a very respectful manner, in private. There should be no washing of dirty linen in the public. If you must criticize, criticize me constructively and not dish out outright damaging information to the public in the name of criticism. Timipre Sylva and that fake Dr. Fente accused me of misplacing N170 billion; well, it is N150 billion and not the amount they are quoting. And in fact that money has been missing since the days of Alamieyeseigha. They should go talk to him.
Sabella: So, you didn’t steal or misappropriate the money?
Jonathan G: I may be a vagabond and all that, but I am not a thief. God knows I will never steal that kind of money. It is just way too much for one man. May be a billion, but not more. Some people are also saying I am gutless and cowardly, that I don’t have the guts and the balls, and that I am not my own man. Well, see where all that got Alamieyeseigha. With all his gragra, he got into wahala with Baba Obasanjo. I am cool-headed. I am good at taking orders. I don’t complain and I don’t question my superiors; I simply do whatever I am told. You see, politics is about survival of the fittest. You do whatever you have to do to survive, including boot licking. Something else, I hear people talk about how I spend all that money for the primaries and the general elections. Nonsense! My critics simply do not have an understanding of the electoral process. You see, you have to spend money for all sorts of things. In my case, I spend money placating General Obasanjo and the entire PDP executives at both the state and federal level. Elections are not cheap you, know.
Sabella: Your Excellency, what about the debt your successor, Governor Timpre Silva is complaining about? Is there any truth to you cleaning and clearing the state account?
Jonathan G: Haba, don’t mind that novice, that political greenhorn. But for all pressure put on me by Daukoru, Ali and Annineh, and that Ijaw General and others, he wouldn’t have been where he is today. Does he know how much was spent on his behalf for him to get where he is today. Nonsense! What does he know about the things grown-ups like me know?
Sabella: Sir, at this point, could you please enumerate the good things you did for the state?
Jonathan G: Look, I don’t have to blow my own horn, I don’t have to kiss myself, I don’t have to trumpet all my stellar achievements. But here is a partial list: (1) upgrade of the Niger Delta University which is now accredited by all domestic and international accreditation boards; (2) building of five general hospitals; (3) building of 160,000 kilometers roads linking all parts of the state; (4) the building of water and sewage treatment plants in more than 80% of the state; as a result my people no longer drink from the River Nun; (5) full and complete employment for all university graduates; (5) availability of small loan for anyone who wants to go into business; and (6) the provision of international satellites for the use of farmers and fishermen. And finally, my rural development/electrification program was completed a month before I left Creek Haven.
Sabella: What do you say to all those who believe you are playing a silly, crazy and treacherous game (when it comes to appointment)? And that you favor your clan, Ogbia. Ogbia people are everywhere.
Jonathan G: All politics is local, what can I tell you. You feed the people closest to you before you feed outsiders. Why don’t you accuse Timipre Sylva of employing just his Nembe people? You see, more than 60% of his appointees are from his clan.
Sabella: Sir, what are your core values, worldviews, and religious convictions?
Jonathan G: (cuts in) Thanks for coming. On your way, make you collect your Ghana-Must-Go…that’s your share of the oil money.
Sabella: Yes, your Excellency…your honor…
Commonwealth of Washington State
Phone: 011234-202-5555-1212
Email: Sabidde@yahoo.com
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Sabella Abidde 
Posted by Robot| 25.08.2008 21:27