My governor is in trouble. The governor of the great state of New York, Chief Dr. Eliot Spitzer, JD, LLM, PhD is in trouble. And it is all George W. Bush’s fault.

Yes. The plight of Governor Eliot Spitzer is another proof that Bush’s abstinence-only sex education does not work.

The fall of Governor Spitzer to the commonest of human urges should be a clarion call for action. Spitzer, a straight-shooting, crime-prosecuting, ethics-brandishing governor should have known about the potholes of wire-taping, gotcha game. Many, now smiling in prisons, owe their prison time to Spitzer’s perfection of that game.

Spitzer knows he must think of how any of his action will look, the day after, on the front page of the Daily News before engaging in such acts. But for reasons definitely beyond his control, the man who went to Albany to fix the place fell on the same sword many politicians have fallen on for hundreds of years.

One shrink came on TV immediately the news broke to say that the governor as Attorney general was fierce in his fight against prostitution because he was fighting his sense of guilt. And that what happened the night before Valentine’s Day in Washington DC was that Spitzer was so tired of the hypocrisy that he wanted to be caught.

So Jesse Jackson wanted to be caught. Bill Clinton wanted to be caught. Bob Livingston wanted to be caught. Newt Gingrich wanted to be caught. Larry Craig wanted to be caught. I don’t buy it.

What I know is that, now, we have to admit it - we are losing our best politicians to itches of the flesh – quite worse with those flesh parts without bones. Something has to be done here or we risk having just men with erectile dysfunction in public office. You must have seen them in Viagra advertisements. Do they look like candidates for governor to you?

My suggestion is simple. Let us use politicians as test cases. Let us support a law that will allow politicians to marry more than one wife. Let it be one fringe benefit that will attract talented people into public service.

Considering the fact that they travel a lot, make so many speeches, shake so many hands, they need special touch to relax after all those hard works. If we let them have a wife in Washington, one on each stop along their constituency and another in their vacation home area, our politicians will be calmer and happier. And maybe they will begin to pass laws that ordinary people can understand.

For women politicians, they can have as many husbands as they like. What is good for goose Hillary is also good for gander Obama.

After passing this generous law, a politician caught with a prostitute would be forced to marry him or her. We know it is feasible because Eddy Murphy married both. That way there will be no more exploitation of the less privileged, minimum-wage-earners in our midst.

If after one year the law seems to be working, we can extend it to the general public. For one, it will bring us closer to the culture of our sworn enemies. In effect, it will nullify one of the reasons why they hate us- becoming a case of using one stone to kill two birds (Pamela Anderson and Dolly Patton)

Think of it, if we had done this long ago, our Republican Party would have had Rudy Giuliani perambulating as a nominee and not the angry old man, John McCain.

My governor is in trouble. That is all I know.

*********************************************************************

Rudolf Ogoo Okonkwo is the author of Children of A Retired God

Robot  Villager

# 1 My governor is in trouble. The governor of the great state of ...Read the full article. Posted by Robot| 11.03.2008 17:00

smartomoge  Villager

# 2 bwahahhaahahhahahhahahahahhahaha!!:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D That was sooo funny. I don't agree, but its funny sha. They don't need extra wives, they need to get saved. I offer prayers for politicians, $1000 an hour. I am even cheaper than Emperors club sef!!:p Posted by smartomoge| 11.03.2008 17:21

Agidimolaja  Villager

# 3 How can I get a copy of your book{children of a retired God}? Considering your posting,that book is a must reading. Posted by Agidimolaja| 12.03.2008 00:32

Bishoporgans  JJC

# 4 Good article excellent reading but, the irony in this is i do not understand how a Rudolf Ogoo Okonkwo will refer to to Elliot Spitzer as his governor. If you mean he governs the state of new york that you live in and by extension your governor its ok but the tone i get is that of a runaway nigerian trying so hard to identify with America so, clarify for me else i order the removal of your name from the list of those we are considering for the award of MON (member order of the niger) in year 2012. Again, if i do not get the clarification in 24hrs, Y'Adua will be duly and officially informed of this gross disrespect for Naija. Mr Ogoo Okonkwo, i hereby await the clarification and your sincere plea of forgiveness to settle me and other nigerians agitated minds.:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad: Posted by Bishoporgans| 12.03.2008 08:03

Dr Damages  Villager

# 5 Thanks to you two, Agidimolaja and Bishoporgans, I have been dragged out her by my boss, Rudolf, to answer your questions. OK. For his book, e dey Amazon.com, Barnes and Nobel and other fine bookstores near your crib. As par whether he dey identify with America, he talk say YES. Say you be a very smart man to identify that. The man don tire for Nija. In fact, he talk say make someone wake am up three years from now when Yar’Adua don win landslide re-election with the likes of Andy Uba as part of the executive council. He says until someone tell am how many delegates e dey take to win PDP primary, he no dey look back. As for MON, he talk say him go buy one from virtual country wey dey give out degrees, honors and Knight-ship. Go figure. If you ask me privately, I go tell you say the man don kuku finish. He dey speak to himself for morning time. That no be good thing, I think. Posted by Dr Damages| 13.03.2008 00:36

Chief Kalu  Villager

# 6 =smartomoge;4294995184>bwahahhaahahhahahhahahahahhahaha!!:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D That was sooo funny. I don't agree, but its funny sha. They don't need extra wives, they need to get saved. I offer prayers for politicians, $1000 an hour. I am even cheaper than Emperors club sef!!:p I have always been an advocate of a wife and several concubines. With that less problem writing a will or settling anybody who wishes a divorce. There is enough kini to work on too. This is "naija' method, they can learn from us and stop disgracing themselves.:D:D Posted by Chief Kalu| 13.03.2008 09:55