1978: Agbegbe had just finished primary six and traveled to Kaduna. The next piece of news about Agbegbe was that he is now working in “masaka” (textile). In the decade of the 70s, Kaduna witnessed a boom in the textile industry with so many village boys benefiting from a kind of ‘cheap’ employment. Indeed, working in “masaka” was a status symbol. The story was only leaked much later, about how Agbegbe arranged with a photographer to come and snap him on his “oga’s” office table while “oga” was on break. But Agbegbe sent a black and white photograph, he was sitting elegantly on the big table, and he used the telephone on the table to “pose”. Within 3 months, the entire village was abuzz with news that Agbegbe had gotten a “big” job in Kaduna. Agbegbe has a big office, he has free telephone to call any part of the world at anytime; he has a “changer” (or turn-table as it was called). Another photograph had Agbegbe sitting on his six-spring iron bed while trying to play a record on his “changer”, the loudspeaker of the “changer” sitting comfortably on a big round clay pot with a small opening to boost the bass of any music that was played.

That was not the only news. The more juicy news was that Agbegbe was going to marry Asabe, the daughter of the neighboring village head. Asabe was 16. Asabe knew Agbegbe but had never been “toasted” by him. However, the pictures of Agbegbe playing music and sitting in the office with a telephone were enough to not only make Asabe “fall”, but also make Asabe the envy of her village friends and sisters. By the next 3 months, Agbegbe and Asabe were married and gone to Kaduna. Indeed, not before long, Agbegbe’s parents brought gifts of a goat and a chicken and grains to Asabe’s family, she was successfully “deflowered” by their son, and they had come to show appreciation because Asabe was “intact” before she married their son, Agbegbe.

This is how much the villages were awash with virgins. So much was the village seen to be full of innocent “virgins” that the many eligible urban based bachelors often sought wives from the stock of village virgins. The city bachelors were never disappointed.

2006: Christmas in My Village

When I’m talking about my village, I am referring to a cluster community of not less a dozen villages/rural settlements; the distance (by trekking) between the two villages farthest from each other is about 30 minutes. This means, one needs only 30 minutes to walk through many villages or at least, reach the farthest village.

What has become of my village youth today is better imagined than witnessed. There are no more virgins. In fact, the level of promiscuity in the village today is much more than in the cities. I observe that during the festive seasons like December, the girls and boys just roam from one village to the other to celebrate the season. Because there are no issues of security or fear of night marauders as exists in cities and towns, the village youth just stray into late hours. These days, they do a lot of parties and sex is a free activity. I get most “shockprised” (shocked and surprised) by the “hot” and skimpy clothes the girls in my village are wearing today.

During village ceremonies, the boys and girls cannot wait for darkness to fall, you’d just see them in pairs, or standing like just one “big” person (they are snuggling so closely you would think it is just one person). Many of the youth simply sleep in the day time and party from village to village for seven nights in the days between Christmas and New Year. Most of the parties happen in the village primary school, which is always in the outskirt of the village, neighboring the village school would be bushes and short tree-plants just sprouting new and fresh leaves according to the season. It is so cool to just cut fresh leaves, spread the leaves on the ground and make a bed out of that. That is how sex has become so cheap among the youth in my village.

Fidelity in Among the Married

When my cousin caught his step-mother red handed, raised alarm and reported to the village chief, majority of people in the village rose in sharp condemnation of my cousin for “spilling the beans”. Another village aunty, whom I respected so much, surprisingly scolded my cousin, "why did you tell? This is what women do to get money to buy wrappers". The village chief called a meeting to address the issue, they adulterer, a village school teacher, was fined a goat. I’m sure most of the elders cared more not for the goat as penalty to punish a shameless adulterer, but for the barbecue off the goat, which they would enjoy over pots of burukutu and/or palmwine!

The village teachers, petty grain/farm produce traders and small “provision” store owners, who have a little extra money to spend every now and then, or at the end of each month, are the “hottest cake” for the women (young and old, married and single). They run their front members like hungry lions seeking prey to devour, and the women, perhaps driven by poverty or sheer libido (?), spread there legs out like whores. What a pity. One teacher, a cousin of mine whose original wife tilled the soil and labored hard to see him through College of Education, has the effrontery to ‘dump’ her (and neglect their 3 kids) for a fellow “teacher”! The ‘dumped’ woman was a very intelligent girl that got her education truncated because she became pregnant.

Consequences

There are consequences. Early marriages and high rates of school drop out for girls especially. Most of the girls, after becoming pregnant, are forced to drop out of school, whether they marry or not. Some of the girls, who cannot pin down who is responsible for the pregnancy, are forced to become single mothers. Eventually, must of the young husbands also drop out of school (for the farm, there’s a lot of free family land!) because of the burden of becoming “head of family” at a so young age. There is also the problem of HIV AIDS. It is ravaging and I think that there have been a couple or more deaths, which were rumored to have resulted from “that ailment”, as my village folk would say.

Is the loss of village innocence common to all Nigerian villages or is it only in my village? Does this cycle of free sex and poverty exist in my village only? Is this affliction unique to my village alone?

Robot  Villager

# 1 When my cousin caught his step-mother red handed, raised alarm and reported to the village chief, ma...Read the full article. Posted by Robot| 05.05.2008 03:12

dele26  Villager

# 2 =Phillip> I"s the loss of village innocence common to all Nigerian villages or is it only in my village? Does this cycle of free sex and poverty exist in my village only? Is this affliction unique to my village alone?" Of course, unique to your village alone ……. in the East? Posted by dele26| 05.05.2008 03:37

The Pledge  Villager

# 3 The replication of the scenario painted in your write up is abound in all villages in this country from North to South, East to West. The advent of the present day civilization and craze to westernize every sphere of our existence is predominantly responsible for this rape on our culture and core values. Children copy from the adults what they see is what they replicate.Howbeit with western movies, fashion and home movies infiltrating every home and culture, making our sacred traditions seem obsolete, indeed this ugly trend is very worrisome. The big challenge here is how do we balance these values? what kind of filtration and moderation does parents need to be put in place? We need complete re-orientation. Posted by The Pledge| 05.05.2008 04:18

Olamide  Villager

# 4 Virgins are an extinct specie nowadays because young girls and boys are starting the 'adult game' younger than their predecessors. The impression that you could find virgins in the villages is just a fallacy because girls and boys in the villages have more freedom to roam around and engage in sex behind the churches, cassava and mango trees and in half-completed buildings while their city contemporaries have to make do with snatches of kisses at the fast-food joints. Going around in the night is out of it except if the person is on a campus. Mostly, girls and young boys in the cities limit themselves to the neighbourhood or better still, the next flat to have love affairs. Infidelity among married couples is as old as history or else, the various ethnic groups would not have developed words for *******s. It is called 'Omo ale' in Yoruba while the Hausas refer to them as "Banza". Unfortunately, I have no idea what our Igbo brethren call their own *******s. The only difference is that married women most especially,in the villages try to be very discreet in the way they conduct their love affairs. I remember while growing up (In the 70s) that our village butcher, Baba Tawa used to visit an Aunty near our house in the evenings and they will close the door for an hour or so while we played football in the open square in front of the compound. Baba Tawa always bring fresh meat during these visits and it was a mutually rewarding experience for both (i assume) because there was never a quarrel. I also remember that Baba Tawa never passed around when the husband of this Aunty was around but because the husband used to work at the Industrial Estate in Sango Otta, he was away from Mondays to Fridays and Baba Tawa must have been 'acting' in the husbands' capacity by providing for the family and warming the Aunty's' 'yansh' while the husband was toiling away in front of the machines at the Industrial Estate. Since we live nearby and could throw spanner in the works, Baba Tawa and the 'Aunty' took great pains to cultivate our friendship and we always enjoyed nice, free meals with succulent pieces of meat and once in a while, a cup of cocoa drink and loaves of bread from the said Aunty. Suffice to say here that we never betrayed them because we were being adequately settled We should stp marvelling at the capacities of the youth to enjoy sex. It has something to do with youthful exuberance and the exernal influences like movies, peer pressure and the environment. Be sure of it that one of the youths of today would write in twenty years' time about the sexual laxity in the youths. Posted by Olamide| 05.05.2008 06:13

cdimkpa  Villager

# 5 =dele26;4295013711>Of course, unique to your village alone ……. in the East? Nay! Nay! In the west. In one of those ''Ogbo'' ''Ogbo'' blah blah blah........ enclaves.:lol::lol: Posted by cdimkpa| 05.05.2008 07:54

OSIBINAEBI  Villager

# 6 =dele26;4295013711>Of course, unique to your village alone ……. in the East? Bros, If anyone will sermonise about his or her village, not you in a million years. Your village is synonimous to the very act of prosmicuity... haba make you take am slow o!!!, like say no be the famous Kaaba:mad::mad:( This gleaned by your own admission). the last i checked,, Kaaba is no where in the East o!!! Posted by OSIBINAEBI| 05.05.2008 10:44

ILN TOO  Villager

# 7 The main reason for the proliferation of promiscuity is the inability of our communities to keep the youngsters gainfully engaged. The devil always has things for idle hands to do. To relieve their ennui, youngsters turn to sex. Village life is monotonous and boring. Posted by ILN TOO| 05.05.2008 11:19

Styles  Villager

# 8 Infidelity does not select the village/region in which it occurs, rather it is the individual(s) that are inclined in that direction(infidelity) that decide to engage in such act. These so called individuals could come-from/reside in any region of the country/world. I'll appreciate it very much everyone if you do not turn this to one of your famous roforofo threads. Posted by Styles| 05.05.2008 11:20

dele26  Villager

# 9 =OSIBINAEBI;4295013826>Bros, If anyone will sermonise about his or her village, not you in a million years. Your village is synonimous to the very act of prosmicuity... haba make you take am slow o!!!, like say no be the famous Kaaba:mad::mad:( This gleaned by your own admission). the last i checked,, Kaaba is no where in the East o!!! SIBINAEBI, thank the good Lord you referred to Kaaba and not the one and only Kabba, the former province Posted by dele26| 05.05.2008 12:54

OSIBINAEBI  Villager

# 10 =dele26;4295013851>SIBINAEBI, thank the good Lord you referred to Kaaba and not the one and only Kabba, the former province KABBA the headquaters of Oyi Local goverment area of kwara state Nigeria, now in KOGI state of NIGERIA, as in the OWE people. I guess this makes it clearer. abeg make you stop the self righteousness and all the holy holy . we sabi the thing. Go out there and see whether KABBA does not equate to promiscuity. does this sound familiar....... broda mi:D:D:D) make i continue to list the different quarters in kabba for you???? abi na when i tell you about the Obaro of Kabba before you sabi say i no make mistake Posted by OSIBINAEBI| 05.05.2008 13:20

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