The Presidents' Concubines

by Phil Tam-Al Alalibo

That man, who truly believes that women are the weaker sex must be a paramount fool sousing aplenty in the cesspool of phantasm. Beginning with the very first man, Adam, history is replete with instances of women being the catalyst of the fall of great men (or is it more appropriate to state the lust for women) and there has been no preferential treatment as to the sphere of life this is occurring. While it is often said that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, they did not tell the complete story as they forgot to add the most potent variable - women. That is why in Nigeria today, banks and other financial institutions do not lure male customers with gourmet food and imported fine Italian wine, but with young and attractive women, well endowed. For those without the anterior blessing, they are forced to wear push-up bras to convey a fraudulent image. While women do not start or hardly fight wars, neither do they possess any weapons of mass destruction; they are well apt to conquering any nation ruled by a man without firing a single shot. We do not have to go too far to fetch the evidence for President Clinton is still alive to attest of the prowess of women. While in office, I mean, the Oval Office, he was momentarily unable to command the affairs of the great nation of the United States when an overweight young college girl held him literally captive under the table.

More examples abound: In June 1998, Nigeria was momentarily colonized by the Indians, I mean, two well-paid, ($50,000 each) chocolate-skinned, sinfully beautiful Indian prostitutes who sent its leader, Abacha, unceremoniously on the path of perdition leaving an entire nation of 150 million, the largest black nation in the world, utterly confused, even today, eight years after. And down south in South Africa, the sixty-something year old Jacob Zuma, former vice president of the next World Cup hosting country is still laundering his image from his sexual indulgence with a 31-year old HIV infected woman with whom he knowingly laid without condoms confessing his weakness to the world. Zuma pleaded momentarily insanity, crazed by the beauty of the lady. The former vice president brought down by this and many other scandals is still trying to wiggle out of his legal troubles.

Even as he ruled the land-locked nation of Zimbabwe with iron fist, the 81-year-old Robert Mugabe could not help but fall hopelessly in love with his 34-year-old secretary, Grace. This was even as his longtime Ghanaian wife, Sally, laid dying in a Harare hospital from cancer. Today, Grace is the nation's First Lady keeping the old man warm at night and dictating the affairs of the nation from the bedroom. But unlike Mugabe, former Kenyan president Daniel Arap Moi has refused to take a wife since he sent his wife of many years packing after she offered him a dirty slap in public in the presence of a teaming crowd of supporters. During his reign and after the infamous slapping incident (didn't current first lady Lucy Kibaki slap a journalist? What's with Kenyan First Ladies and slaps?), the presidential mansion crawled with an assortment of women and it was said that the old man hardly had time for state functions as he was often tired and sleepy after sexual escapades with his many female patrons.

And not to be outdone, the sordid dictator of Uganda, the so-called Field Marshall, Idi Amin Dada, once told his nation in 1973 that he was going out of sight for a month during which he would father at least two hundred babies. He warned an anxious nation to be on its best behavior during this time, as an interruption of this plan would be met with severe consequences. After a month, the unscrupulous ruler emerged and declared, "Mission accomplished." Even as one mission got accomplished in Kampala, another was being accomplished in faraway Ghana – the reign of women. For six years, (1972-78) women ruled Ghana during the rumpus reign of General Ignatius Kutu Acheampong whose weakness for anything in skirt was hardly a national secret. In the midst of austerity and biting hardship, Acheampong somehow found the money to buy hundreds of VW Golf cars for each of the women that shared his bed. The women were said to have asked for high favors from government many of which were granted. In those years in Ghana, any woman seen driving a VW Golf car was accused of being the general's concubine risking assault and death. Like Moi, the Sandhurst trained soldier was always in bed as Ghana went to hell in a hand basket.

The story gets grimmer in the US with President John F. kennedy's well-documented affair with actress Marilyn Monroe even as he was married to Jacquelyn, his beauteous wife. So egregious were these affairs that Jacquelyn went into depression on many occasions. The trend continued many years later as in 1984, US democratic presidential candidate, Senator Gary Hart of Colorado, was disgraced out of the presidential race that had the likes of New York Congresswoman Geraldine Ferraro, former vice president Walter Mondale and the Rev. Jesse Jackson. Senator Hart got into trouble when pictures of him surfaced with the voluptuous model Donna Rice sitting on his laps on a Caribbean beach. The senator was happily married then and could not explain what he was doing with a sexy model sitting compromisingly on his laps when he was supposed to be working for the people of Colorado in Washington. Talking about Rev. Jesse Jackson, hasn’t it been confirmed that he fell to the lure of a young lady and fathered a child just a few years ago even as he stood in counsel of the Clintons?

In Nigeria, no president or head of state can acquit himself favorably from the damning accusation of courtesan while in office except perhaps, Buhari and Shagari, both of whom remained clueless in this area and in many others. As far back as the 1960s, it was long rumored that youthful Yakubu (Jack) Gowon entertained regular female visitors in Dodan Barracks as a bachelor head of state. Being a bachelor then, I am certain, history will be kinder to him. He was young, attractive and single and the sky remained the limit for this Tiv soldier with a flattering personality. It was not until he married the deceptively stunning Victoria at the age of 32 did the visits allegedly stop. While on the books Ibrahim Babangida ruled Nigeria from August 17, 1985 to August 27, 1993, in reality, it was Delta native Maryam Babangida that ruled the nation during this time, dictating to her husband each and every move. Maryam was the closest adviser to the dictator and it is doubtful that she did not accord her blessings to the many decisions and actions that occurred on her husband's watch, including the execution of coup plotters. By all accounts, Babangida remained a stooge of his wife as she ruled Nigeria from the bedroom. There were other women in Babangida's life as well. Who was Gloria Okon? Was she just a drug carrier for the Babangida family or her duties extended into his bedroom? Like the Maradona he is, Babangida has succeeded in dribbling the nation into the dark on this score, but not for long.

As we speak of presidents' concubines - how about Obasanjo the alleged born-again Christian? Is he trying to bring into relevance the old testament of the Bible that sanctioned multiple wives? Is he trying to be a King Solomon? It appears that the Ogun farmer has given a new meaning to the term "concubine" with his limitless harem gallivanting Nigeria and beyond. As it is, baba has wives, girlfriends and concubines all over the globe. I have even heard a woman in Ohio claiming to be his wife and she is not deranged being a known professor in the behavioral sciences. It, thus, stands to reason that to date, no one knows the exact number of children baba has and it is very doubtful that he has that information. Like Gowon, Obasanjo days in Dodan Barracks were reeked with concubines and mistresses flowing like River Niger and newly wed Stella (RIP) could only reckon what fate had bequeathed her. I was in a military social in the 80s, in Lagos, in the company of soldiers when I heard the joke about Obasanjo and his women. The joke went; if Obasano in spite of his looks could have so many women at his beck and call, there was hope for all and sundry. 

Even in his golden years at 70 plus, baba is still trucking the path of the philanderer with refurbished zest and gusto with no respite in sight. What manner of strength at this age, Mr. President. Is it Viagra?  Recent revelation by the Atiku camp that he withdrew money from the Marine Float Account to purchase a car for a woman friend validates this point. It also validates the frugal nature of the man in Aso Rock, purchasing a Peugeot 609 with public money instead of dipping into his own pocket. What way to impress a lady? With his Otta farm yielding $250,000 per month as confessed by the president’s assistant, he still could not afford a car for his mistress without Nigeria’s oil money? Information has it that a brand new Peugeot 609 cost a meager N3.9 million, chicken change for Obasanjo given the above monthly intake.

Many are still wondering how the president ended up with a classy, pulchritudinous and sophisticated woman in the person of Stella Abebe, daughter of Dr. & Mrs. Charles Abebe. How did it happen? Even Obasanjo cannot answer this question and has said in public that as a military ragamuffin he did not know why she said yes to him. I have had the occasion of meeting the late First Lady and the president at a luncheon held in their honor on one of their many visits to the US. She was indeed a paragon even in her fifties. Her air was classy, her steps gracious, even when she ate it looked as though the food was going into someone else’s mouth. The woman devoured a plate of rice with her lipstick well intact. When I glanced at her and Mr. President, the difference was brazen, almost nauseating, as he could be easily mistaken for her bodyguard. I am reminded of the saying that good girls are always attracted to bad boys, a phenomenon that even the likes of singers Whitney Houston and Tina Turner could hardly explain. On that occasion, I felt like pulling him aside, man to man, and asking him, “Mr. President, how did you get so lucky and why all the philandering with such luck?"

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The author writes from Virginia and can be reached at alalibo@gmail.com

Robot  Villager

# 1 The Presidents' Co...Read the full article. Posted by Robot| 27.09.2006 23:56

Abraxas  Villager

# 2 Hi, folks! Weda wota pass garri, or na garri pass wota, na di same t’in ni-o-o-o-O! Anyway, sha, please do not remember to forget that we have precisely 8 months, 1 day, 5 hours, 46 minutes, and 23 seconds more to go, before our Messiah, who art in Aso Rock Villa, Asokoro District, Abuja, Nigeria, makes his FINAL exit at 12:00 noon sharp, on Tuesday, 29 May 2007! Hip! Hip!! Hip!!! Hurray!!!! Glory be to GOD Almighty Most High! Muchas gracias. Don Juan Carlos ABRAXAS (III) (Director of Operations, Logistics, Tactics & Strategy, Special Task Force on the Effective Evacuation of OBJ from Aso Rock Villa to Owu) Posted by Abraxas| 28.09.2006 01:19

akuluouno  Villager

# 3 I really do not care about all the presidents penis inspired presidential peccadillos,provided that good governance and economic development goes on. Wait until we have a homosexual as a president and you will not have mouth to say anything again. Posted by akuluouno| 28.09.2006 05:35

Exxcuzme  Villager

# 4 ___________________________________________________________________ Wait until we have a homosexual as a president and you will not have mouth to say anything again ___________________________________________________________________ I thought we had one, Babaginda, who might also be our next president. Posted by Exxcuzme| 28.09.2006 06:48

ITOOKNOW

# 5 Please someone should advice Baba to be careful in using viagra. With his age he can die on top of the thing under the influence of viagra. This is a security advice which I am releasing free. Posted by ITOOKNOW| 28.09.2006 07:34

akuluouno  Villager

# 6 There you see the genuis is evil even down below. Posted by akuluouno| 28.09.2006 09:16

MrOneNaija  Villager

# 7 A DICTATOR'S MISTRESSES The President and his mistresses, by Sam Nda-Isaiah, Leadership newspaper Today, I am going to discuss a topic which even though has been a subject of animated discussion among Nigerians of all classes in the past seven years, has hardly found _expression on the pages of Nigerian newspapers. The subject, as can be gleaned from the title of the column today, is the interesting and curious relationship between the president and the opposite sex. Ordinarily, one’s love life should be a private affair. But in this case, it is no longer in that realm because, first, the president of a nation is not a private citizen. Second and perhaps more germane for us in Nigeria, is the fact that this presidential lasciviousness is already affecting the way the Nigerian state is run. If President Olusegun Obasanjo were to be a private Ota chicken farmer, no one would have bothered if he has the libido of a he-goat. But the Nigerian president is not. He is the leader of Africa’s most populous nation and potentially its most influential. The Nigerian president takes decisions that affect the lives of what might as well be more than 150 million people and some of the decisions he has taken already are impacting on the Nigeria we will leave behind for our progeny. The incessant fuel price increases for instance have changed the fortunes of the majority of Nigerians and their children yet unborn. The president’s petulant refusal to retire the Inspector General of Police, for self-serving reasons of course, who has been long due for retirement and even though he is not performing, might have caused more unresolved assassinations and deaths by armed robbery. His deliberate choice of dubious characters to superintend the 2003 general elections killed democracy in 2003. And whether we want to deceive ourselves or not, we are currently in the last days of this contraption we call democracy and history will prove this presently. But all that is by the way! The president is a known compulsive philanderer and this is authoritative. We got this firm confirmation from no less a personality than the First Daughter herself, Ms Iyabo Obasanjo. In a recent interview with Daily Sun, Ms Obasanjo made herself clear. “My father loves women and he knows it,” she declared. We should also be thankful to Vice President Atiku Abubakar who mercifully revealed to us recently that the president bought several cars for his paramours through a slush fund they both operated at the expense of the Nigerian people. That’s even only the women the VP is privy to, as the president definitely has several others scattered all over the place ministering to his erotic needs. And it will only be reasonable to think that if the president will purchase expensive cars for mistresses, he will also be the one responsible for the general upkeep of such women and, of course, the general maintenance of the posh cars. It will also be plausible to assume that the president has offered appointments and contracts to several women more for what they offer him in bed than what they can offer the Nigerian state. During Obasanjo’s first term, Nigerians used to be entertained with executive gossip (sometimes from presidential aides) of the ‘incestuous’ relationship between the president and his female ministers, some of who were married. That was when the terms “minister/mistress” and the “queen of the cabinet” entered our lexicon. We were occasionally treated to scintillating details that suggested that our septuagenarian president, who had performed so dismally in statecraft, was after all a super stud. Of course, by then, all the tales about a born-again Christian president had evaporated into thin air. The president himself was even said to have whimsically told some of his friends shortly after he took over power in 1999 that he was born-again only from his head to the waist. Meaning that his loins had nothing to do with the term “born-again”. The president meant it to be a joke, but some of those present did not laugh. It was not funny. That was when it dawned on some people that the president’s “born-againness” had not been tested outside prison and if he was born-again at all, he needed to get born-again, again. It will be difficult to know what the president wants to prove at 70. What new territories would a 70-year-old want to conquer if he had not already done so in his 20s and 30s? Of what purpose would it be to capture fresh virgin lands at that stage of one’s existence? Not even the HIV scourge had made much sense to him. A former female minister from the South East once told her colleagues that their boss’s strategy against the HIV scourge was to engage only women above 50 years. His funny logic was that the HIV/AIDS pandemic being a recent plague would not be common in such an older women group. How illiterate! Like I said last week, newspapers and associates have linked the president to more than 32 women and 70 children. If he disputes the paternity of about 10 of the children, then it means the president may have roughly 60 children at the very least. I wonder why the Guinness Book of World Records has not taken notice yet. The president must have read the Biblical injunction of “go ye into the world and multiply…” out of context. Any 70-year-old man who is so salaciously reckless must be investing quite heavily in Viagra or its derivatives. But again, we are told by the experts that such drugs are decidedly dangerous for certain people, especially the elderly. The president was said to have collapsed sometime ago during a bout of squash, quickly sparking rumours across the country that he had gone home to be with the Lord. Doctors should be able to determine whether there was any direct relationship between that black-out and the generous intake of Viagra. But if the president cannot slow down, we should beg him to heed the good counsel of Dr (Mrs) Dora Akunyili, the energetic director-general of NAFDAC, who authoritatively told us about a fortnight ago that cocoa is a better aphrodisiac than Viagra. The National Assembly could even show loyalty by passing a supplementary budget solely dedicated for the purchase of good quality cocoa for Aso Rock. We can’t afford another president dying in office again. Worse still of the same cause. All said, Obasanjo’s problems are just too many. I am not about to suggest that siring 70 children out of wedlock is an impeachable offence, but smooching more than 30 women, some of them married, in the lifetime of a presidency should definitely qualify as a misdemeanour of impeachment proportions. It is not that Obasanjo is the first libertine to lead this country, but none has been this openly lewd. It is dangerous for everyone to pretend that nothing is wrong. You can’t teach your children that rigging elections, stealing public funds and leading the life of a Casanova are normal ways of life and expect the next generation to be globally competitive. It is not for nothing that such matters are serious campaign issues in civilised democracies. Obasanjo has failed so badly as a leader, precisely because he doesn’t possess the right leadership values. I am not in anyway suggesting that we elect a clergyman in 2007 for president, but we must certainly not have a Don Juan in Aso Rock again! - Culled from Leadership, Abuja, 25 Sept., 2006. Posted by MrOneNaija| 28.09.2006 11:11

planet1899  Villager

# 8 MrOneNaija, very good posting and makes for a veryu good read....Mr. President is having fun...gush... Posted by planet1899| 28.09.2006 11:23

DoubleWahala  Villager

# 9 =ITOOKNOW;132424>Please someone should advice Baba to be careful in using viagra. With his age he can die on top of the thing under the influence of viagra. This is a security advice which I am releasing free. Yes. I support your "security advice". It would be most unbecoming if we were forced to acknowledge to the whole world that our president 'came and went'. :D DW Posted by DoubleWahala| 28.09.2006 12:30

Rose  Villager

# 10 =DoubleWahala;132475>Yes. I support your "security advice". It would be most unbecoming if we were forced to acknowledge to the whole world that our president 'came and went'. :D DW I hope he doesn't end up like Nelson Rockefeller.:D Posted by Rose| 28.09.2006 12:34

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