INNATE POLYGAMY CROSSES SEXUAL HARASSMENT

Farouk Martins Aresa

Sexual harassment has exposed the hypocrisy of naturally born polygamists in the world of monogamists. They cannot keep their hands off ladies other countries usually take full legal responsibility for as wives. If the hypocrites have their way, the whole world will be full of deceitful serial monogamists, destroying cultures, women and families.

The last we checked, polygamy is still practiced by majority of people worldwide but less so amongst younger people. As some men get older and wealthier, desire for younger ladies creeps in, seeking more girlfriends or wives. The same is true of women polyandry as they become powerful and independent. However, lurking in the shadow is the risk of sexual harassment by those power drunk bosses, politicians, businessmen, Emir or Oba.

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Since Clinton’s - because I can - those held in trust without questions; lustful disposition is falling apart. In those days, when an Oba “stepped” on a lady he liked, passing by, she was his. So if a lady wanted to get the attention of an Oba, she could. But today, she can flirt with him and still say no, just as anyone else. He may be the rich and powerful of any status. Few younger men or women would go for poor old folks just for the fun of it.

Sure, some highly placed people may get shafted but we must err on the side of those young ladies so that they are not taken advantage of, before they can attain a career. More restrain and control is expected from matured people.

Some studies suggest women cheat equally by hedonistic pursuit of happiness. Plastic surgery and better financial stability made the difference. Women without children or whose children have grown out of sight are accommodating more men just as older men are courting younger women. The fear that old women anatomy is not constructed to oblige younger men’s libido may have to be reassessed in view of V-reconstruction.

A friend warned that she would not be responsible for a new kid after hearing some rumbling in the guest room when the dad and mum were on a visit. She could not believe her parents were still doing it. They couldn’t wait until they got back home?

It is also true that some of the older men and women, spurred by confidence of wealth, status or in some cases fat pension go to places where their money can stretch far. Poor or ambitious young men and women may be available but at a higher price or blackmail. While the older folks may be looking for a partner for the rest of their lives, the younger people may be looking for fast money to inherit so that they could start a new life.

Since the bloody fights between older men and younger women, especially in United States, there seems to be a period of calm. One of the most important factors is that the older men felt their investment into a new family hardly paid off. If a man or a woman cannot invest in his or her new family, there is no better investment. As the numbers of men coming back home to marry has trickled, it is too early to condemn Oba as vulture.

Older folks live longer these days and sometimes do not know what to do with the rest of their time. Some may take on a new career, hobby or even go back to school. Some get drugged for libido to come alive. After retirement, some older adults reenter the workforce or go for a second career. They dye their hair and change their looks to be more attractive and may turn into tigers and cougars at a higher proportion than ever.

There are public health issues here, as disfigurement. We had the wife of a head of state and the mother of Kanye that died from plastic surgery. Some older folks suffered loss of partners or get divorced, still sexually apt. Many find partners in the same situation. It must be admitted that there are not many dating services for the seniors. So, the very active ones meet some younger men or women. Others are just addicted philanderer.

The chasing and capturing may be more fun for the older folks than the action itself. Both older men and women are limited by their age to less stress during intercourse. Yet most men never listen and end up dead on top of their younger partner. The rational is that, it is a better way to go than on top of some undesirable partner. We hardly hear about a younger man dying on top an older woman. Polyandry acts are more natural?

The society may therefore need recreational activities, apart from adult daycare, within the comfort of the elderly. Indeed, businesses springing up such as disco clubs, jazz clubs and elderly entertainment may be as useful as seniors’ daycare and nursing homes since they cannot have babies. Some societies have barred wealthy men from acting boorish behind Men’s Only Club. Though exalted, Obi is as susceptible as others to opportunists.

Everybody is not a gold digger as there are many happily married couples in spite of the age differences. There is the saying that – I would rather be the darling of an old man than “whatever” of a young man. Older women relationships with younger men do not usually last as long in spite of all the scientific discoveries made to keep them younger. Plastic surgery can be expensive for a limited time than genital reconstruction benefit.

Indeed, a healthy relationship can develop between the old and young without sexual relationship but of very little benefit to the partner that may want a new family or for the younger partner to start a family. Older women seeking those types of relationships have always insisted that sex is not just for procreation, a younger guy may disagree. The danger is there that in spite of replenished lubrication, he may tear it up. Eh!

In any case, the excitement of looking forward to sex has introduced a new behavior to the relationship of men and women in their later years as part of living longer. Longer life has brought the advantages and disadvantages of filling it up with excitement to be relevant to younger people. Advance age also mean we have to be able to live on what is saved and invested before the age of forty. But young men and women spend faster.

Older men going to old countries in Europe, Asia and Africa to live in paradise or marry younger brides has backfired because of increasing violence and some irreconcilable differences between each partner’s expectations. Those older women coming from Europe and America have been able to hook up with their toy boys in Africa and Asia as well, even for the purpose of regularizing their immigration papers.


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Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
M. Akosa posted on 08-12-2012, 10:06:23 AM
QUOTE:
HP,

You are still making a clean clear distinction where there are fine lines. Check out civil and criminal harassment and no contact order. It all depends on the genuine and in some cases irrational fear of women. In the few cases, it destroys men or with a number on their heads preventing them from finding good jobs.

However, you have conveniently ignored women's with multiple partners.

I think the author also ignored other factors ( which may confuse others more). Mainly religion as in Mormon Church when they cross the line into criminal or civil harassment. One more, you made some solid defense of Catholic priests in Nigeria some years ago that abuse of young boys and young women never happened in Nigeria until many from the areas you indicated came and proved you wrong on this. These were what the writer called \"innate polygamists\" on the prowl without a silence. They are the same people that condemned Africans for their polygamy. There are other factors the writer did not touch, but these will suffice.

Let me end by agreeing with you that young women suffered in silence for years until now. That backs up the writer's stats that abuse has gone down.


I think that a lot of things are being muddled up together here, without looking at the time and location of these events and the circumstances where they are happening.

The mormon issue is a location thing and territorial something. If any young woman who truly doesn't want themselves caught up in a powerless, scheming, manipulative or vulnerable polygamy family/marriage arrangement, likewise also in a marriage with an older man; what they must do is to flee, leave, run fast away as far as possible from that environment. And never look back for mercy or any sympathy from their kin or other family members and relatives like parents who may likely influence their decision to remain in that bad situation or accept it as no other viable option or choices again for them in life.

Like I said earlier, usually polygamist will only seek out like minded people or those also in the same envrionments as they are who will accept their lifestyle and join the harem. So, based on that idea alone, you just can't brand every polygamist of potential sexual harrassment or involved in such activity.

Also, I wouldn't brand every catholic priest a rapist or potential sexual predator, likewise I wouldn't brand every nun a witch or potential connving person or instigator of abuse and hurting others going by what many of them have been convicted of, like in the USA, UK and Ireland; or in Rwanda where both the Catholic priests and nuns were active in condoning genocide or personally directly involved in mass murder.
Like I said it is an environmental factor and location also. My own mother have biological children today, only thanks to the Irish nuns and priests of the Roman Catholic church in Nigeria. There is not a single account of abuse or exploitation in her personal experiences or interactions with them. Otherwise she would never have patronised them, go anywhere near them or remained using their services and always returning back to them both in Nigeria and overseas for thanks and gratitude.
Same with anyone who is at risk of polygamy against their choices or by coersion. Do not hang around and refrain from contacts.

I do agree that poverty and desperation is another factor for polygamy or vulnerabilty to abuse and sexual harrassment, but it altogether another topic. Instead of justifying branding of polygamists here.
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
HolyPagan posted on 08-13-2012, 03:56:27 AM
QUOTE:
HP,

You are still making a clean clear distinction where there are fine lines. Check out civil and criminal harassment and no contact order. It all depends on the genuine and in some cases irrational fear of women. In the few cases, it destroys men or with a number on their heads preventing them from finding good jobs.

However, you have conveniently ignored women's with multiple partners.

I think the author also ignored other factors ( which may confuse others more). Mainly religion as in Mormon Church when they cross the line into criminal or civil harassment. One more, you made some solid defense of Catholic priests in Nigeria some years ago that abuse of young boys and young women never happened in Nigeria until many from the areas you indicated came and proved you wrong on this. These were what the writer called \"innate polygamists\" on the prowl without a silence. They are the same people that condemned Africans for their polygamy. There are other factors the writer did not touch, but these will suffice.

Let me end by agreeing with you that young women suffered in silence for years until now. That backs up the writer's stats that abuse has gone down.


Your post starts with HP,
I am therefore safe in assuming that your statement I have just highlighted, is referring to me,
Are you trying to be mischievous?
I have never defended any priest, catholic or otherwise, whether on NVS or outside it, especially in a matter as grave as child abuse, I dont know how you came up with that assertion you just made.

That said, You are mixing chalk and cheese.
I am getting more and more confused by the jambalaya of an argument you present.

That said, are you talking about Nigeria/Africa or Utah/USA?
Are you talking about Historical prevalence or Present day occurence?

In reply to your arguement about restraining orders vis-a-vis sexual harrasment, Please note, that a criminal indictment can flow from a failure to abide by a civil censure, It is part of how ordered societies make sure that law and order obtains, and society does not break down.
If a person fails to abide by a court ordered sanction, even if the originating procedure was in Tort (civil law), they have strayed into the gambit of an action in criminal law, by their failure to obey a lawfully constituted court order.
In this case, failure to obey a restraining order, that is consequent upon a suit brought as a remedy against sexual harrasment, does not mean there is a criminal offense of 'sexual harassment' rather it usually is one of contempt of court.
I need to point out also, that a lot of the elements of the offense of assault/ battery/false imprisonment etc, are usually also present within the particulars of most incidents of sexual harassment.
Depending on the severity or the circumstances, a person can be charged with the afore mentioned criminal offence, if the victim chooses to go the route of making a formal complaint to the police.(ie reporting a crime)
The law will charge a person with a crime of assault battery etc, but never as a crime of sexual harassment.

Thanks all the same...I'm done with this thread.
BTW you will do well, to make sure you don't allege falsehood just to make a point. I have never defended pedophile priests, and I take offence to your false accusation.
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
Magic posted on 08-13-2012, 10:12:03 AM
My dear HP,

I have pm you the details of your post during discussion with other villagers in 2010. If you want, you can make it public. But I do not want this discussion to degenerate into personal insults. We will only lose the point we are trying to make.

Now back to topic. I do appreciate the fact that you did your homework and came up with
QUOTE:
In reply to your arguement about restraining orders vis-a-vis sexual harrasment, Please note, that a criminal indictment can flow from a failure to abide by a civil censure, It is part of how ordered societies make sure that law and order obtains, and society does not break down.
If a person fails to abide by a court ordered sanction, even if the originating procedure was in Tort (civil law), they have strayed into the gambit of an action in criminal law, by their failure to obey a lawfully constituted court order.
In this case, failure to obey a restraining order, that is consequent upon a suit brought as a remedy against sexual harrasment, does not mean there is a criminal offense of 'sexual harassment' rather it usually is one of contempt of court.
I need to point out also, that a lot of the elements of the offense of assault/ battery/false imprisonment etc, are usually also present within the particulars of most incidents of sexual harassment.
Depending on the severity or the circumstances, a person can be charged with the afore mentioned criminal offence, if the victim chooses to go the route of making a formal complaint to the police.(ie reporting a crime)
The law will charge a person with a crime of assault battery etc, but never as a crime of sexual harassment.


I cannot agree with you more. I think we are now on the same page. This is best illustrated by the wahala one of the oba finds himself today. It started with flirting with a young NYC er. It got to consensual sexual relations by testimonies of those that know them. It then went to sexual harassment, criminal harassment and the oba was later detained. I do not want to get involve in he said, she said but hospital report did not indicate forceful entry.

As for place, area and locations being mixed up. Please note that there is no mix up. Polygamy was practiced long before missionaries came and label it a SIN. We as Africans converted and also called it a SIN. They came from far and wide from a different area and location to my area and location to label my custom a sin. Little did we know that not only were some of them "innate polygamist", they were vicious serial monogamists, voracious insidious polygamists and abusers of young boys and girls. How dare them label my custom a sin?

NVS has made progress and enlightened many of us, even one of my friends claimed not all polygamists are bad. What a progress NVS! We have moved many miles on this polygamy stuff. It is worth celebrating, isn't it?

While a couple of people claimed there were too many unrelated jumbos in the article, they have introduced their own to make it more complicated including introduction of poverty, religion and even Mormon Church by moi. So if the writer is guilty,our introductions have made the article more complicated. However, we are bright enough to understand all the factors introduced since we are not of fickle minds. Black people like to read complicated stuff contrary to distractors.

So my dear HP, we must flirt without getting into trouble. It is the spice of life.
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
HolyPagan posted on 08-14-2012, 08:03:34 AM
Magic,
Noooooooooooo

Please post link to the thread in question, and give the post number.
pm wont do.

I have just read the pm you sent.

I want this public.

Thanks
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
HolyPagan posted on 08-14-2012, 08:19:20 AM
NVS people please I take God beg una
could somebody help me find this Catholic Priests and Pedophilia thread.

I want to get to the bottom of Magic's accusation.

Thanks.
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
Denker posted on 08-14-2012, 08:37:18 AM
QUOTE:
NVS people please I take God beg una
could somebody help me find this Catholic Priests and Pedophilia thread.

I want to get to the bottom of Magic's accusation.

Thanks.


http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com/forum/search.php?searchid=23939
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
HolyPagan posted on 08-14-2012, 09:29:53 AM

Denker this is too serious for your usual mucking about.
That link you posted is a dud link....make yourself useful, find me the post you hia?
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
HolyPagan posted on 08-14-2012, 09:53:16 AM
Magic,
I am truly dissapointed with you and your attempt to win an argument at all costs.

So you went to a thread, saw a post that was clearly made by somebody else, and came here to attribute it to me?
No wonder you failed to post a link.

Anyway below is a link to the thread in question;

http://www.nigeriavillagesquare.com/forum/main-square/49477-abuse-african-children-catholic-priests-veiled-stigma.html

And the post you falsely accused me of making is [COLOR="#FF0000"][/COLOR]Post #5
even though by copying, posting it to me in pm, you knew it was not made by me.
It's a shame that you would go to a post, knowing fully well that it was made by somebody else, copy and paste it, in a pm to me, and lie about the author, just so you can score cheap points.
did you think that I would not know my own writing style?

You did not just stop there,
You then come to the open forum, and refer to the dishonest c&p jobbie.
knowing very well that I did not make the post in question.
What were you trying to achieve?
Na waa for the lengths people will go to win an argument.

I have reproduced the pm. you sent me below;

QUOTE:
HolyPagan
Re: Abuse Of African Children By Catholic Priests Veiled By Stigma
QUOTE:

Let all those who were abused as children by Catholic priests in Nigeria please stand up.

It may surprise you to know that the Catholic Church in Nigeria is run by Nigerians in spite of the presence of foreign missionaries. More so before than now true, but we have had more than three generations of succeeding Nigerian Bishops. That would put the blame of any wrong doing squarely on the shoulders of your Nigerian brother, if for nothing, for negligence on their watch.

Stay hopes of getting big payoffs. Most if not all parishes (barring out stations) are run autonomously. This has been the case since Rome cut the apron strings decades ago.

The problems in the Catholic Church in Nigeria, reflect the society. Paedophilia, if it happens is not high on the list. The priests who have been reported as strayed have done so with women old enough, some are even rumoured to have set up home and have children with the said women. Priests are also rumoured to receive graft and to siphon away church funds for personal use. Now that sounds like Nigeria, donnit?

As I said, anyone seeking to get some kind of payoff from the Catholic Church in Nigeria had better be ready for a less than victorious battle. The Church is still struggling to raise money for various projects (universities, schools, youth centres, jdpc, etc.) with minimal if any support from their wealthier brothers in the west.

If you want to know what goes on in the Sacristy, all you have to do is visit one. Nothing but a changing room really, only one in which prayers are said as the vestments are donned. The priest does not even disrobe, he simply puts all those extra cloaks over his outer garments. (Think cassock and supplice). the confessional is two rooms separated by a wall with a grid at a high enough level to allow sound through. You would have to be an acrobatic gymnast to get anything done in there.

The only private place in the church is the Priests house and that is almost always off limits to parishioners. So take notice parent if your child is going to out of the way places with your priest. The fact of their priesthood does not make them less human. Instead of setting them up to fall we are meant to do our part by taking precaution.

By the way, the Catholic Church is like any organisation. They do not primarily police each other all over the place. The determined wrong doer would hide just as they would in other places and others who see would also keep quiet because they do not want to stir the hornets nest, again just as they would in other places. Whistle blowing is always a difficult task and many of us play ostrich even as we fantacise about being crusading heroes.


Your false attribution aside...its a shame that what you could take away from my posts on that thread is that I sided with pedophile priests.

Just like you see a baseless defence by a rapist Oba, seeking to cast aspersion on a rape victim, as proof of consent.
Are you not aware that even if they had just tumbled out of bed 10seconds earlier, if she said no to any subsequent sexual overtures from him, it means NO and no prior sexual encounter between them justifies rape?
Since when does a lack of injury to a vagina, become conclusive proof that there was consent to sexual intercourse by a woman?
how about if he threatened her life like the Oba did? and the the poor victim acquiesced out of terror,how will that show up as injury to her vagina?
In case you don't know, rape is about lack of consent to sexual intercourse, it is not about the amount of injury to the victim's genitals.
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
Denker posted on 08-14-2012, 10:02:56 AM
nne, hp,..ya see how i assist in ma little way to manavoer ya to find ya way in the labyrinth of searching features of nvs...lol
Re: Innate Polygamist Crosses Sexual Harassment
HolyPagan posted on 08-14-2012, 10:08:55 AM
QUOTE:
nne, hp,..ya see how i assist in ma little way to manavoer ya to find ya way in the labyrinth of searching features of nvs...lol

Yea right!!!!!!...by sending me on a wild goose chase.
no be you help me biko.
I did a search, and it sent me to the correct thread.
So to you I say.............Thanks but no thanks.
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