“I know, I know. Finish this proverb” Joyin said enthusiastically. “Ọmọde gbọn agba gbọn (children are wise and adults are wise).”

Jayọ: Em, Gbogbo wa gbọn (we are all wise). That’s wrong. She laughed. “I don’t know.”

Joyin: You lost again. It is lafi dalẹ Ifẹ (is the wisdom on which Ile-Ifẹ [historical Yoruba city] was built).

I was enjoying how two Yoruba ladies evaluated their knowledge of Yoruba proverbs. They each had a pile of flash cards listing Yoruba proverbs. So far, Joyin, the younger of the two cousins, was winning the game.

Jayọ: Amukun toun daran (The lame person that commits a crime)?

Joyin: Ọrun ẹlẹsẹ meji loun dale (Commits a crime on the neck of the person who is whole).

Jayọ: You’re right again.

Joyin: Ile lanwo (We consider the home)?

Jayọ: Katosọmọ lorukọ (before we name a child). That’s an easy one.

Joyin: You finally got one. End of round one. I got 8 out of ten and you got only one. You need to study more Yoruba proverbs. Now let’s start round two.

Jayọ: Kosiduro, kosijoko (There’s no standing up or sitting down)?

Joyin: Hmm. I don’t know.

Jayọ: Fenitogbodomi (For the person that swallowed a mortar). First strike out.

Joyin: Biwaju o başe lọ (If the journey cannot be continued)?

Jayọ: Ẹyin a şe pada si ((we can return to where we came from)

Joyin: You got it.

Jayọ: Baba jona (Father burnt in the fire)?

Joyin: Ẹnbere irungbọn (And you’re asking for his beard?)

Jayọ: Okay, you’re catching on.

Joyin: Ọwọ ọmọde oto pẹpẹ (The hands of a child do not reach the high shelf)

Jayọ: Tagbalagba o wọ kengbe (The hands of an adult cannot enter the mouth of a gourd).

Jẹyọ came into the restaurant and rather than join her cousins in the game, she requested that I follow her into the conference room. She needed my counsel.

Jẹyọ: Auntie Derbrah. I need help. I’m burdened. I…

Her cell phone rang and she excused herself to receive the call.

That gave me time to look around. I hadn’t been inside the conference room since the anniversary. Mama Jade was a purple color fan. Her conference room was painted royal. The photographs on the walls were beautiful, nicely mounted, one on each corner. Jẹyọ’s voice cut through my thoughts;

Jẹyọ: Auntie, ẹma binu simi (pardon me). How does one get over the insecurity of past failures?

“By faith in God’s unending love and walking in love towards oneself.” I replied.

Jẹyọ: Please give me the steps. This issue is distressing me.

“It’s a process. The level of commitment you give to working at it speeds it up.” I answered. “Past failures create insecurities because we are analytical beings. We lose self-confidence each time we make wrong choices. This leads to what is usually called value-judging. What I recommend is casting the care of insecurity upon the Lord each time one fails.”

Jẹyọ: I have done a general casting my burden upon the Lord prayer. Some burdens just return and they’re linked to my personality type. There are just some things I will not allow and some things I will tolerate. These choices I make do bring dividends or distress. I need help.

“Christ is your help.” I stated. “I could give you five steps, twenty steps or three steps, it may or may not work. Since you’ve linked it to your personality, trust Christ to help you mature in that area.”

Jẹyọ: Auntie, this is a not a matter of trust but knowledge. For example look at this,

She gave me two sheets of paper detailing her gifts, desires and resources. I realized that this was going to take a while. I was expecting a music group to arrive in a couple of minutes. I excused myself to give new instructions to Jayọ and Joyin. When I got to the two ladies I asked, “Who won the second round?”

Jayọ: I did. It’s a tie.

“I’m going to be with Jẹyọ for a while.” I informed them. “I’m expecting three gentlemen called D-Trio. Let me know when they arrive.”

When I returned to the conference room, Jẹyọ was more relaxed.

Jẹyọ: By my estimation, I should be here, but I’m still here.

She pointed at different spots on her sheet.

There was a knock on the door and Joyin announced the arrival of D-Trio. I requested that she show them in, then reached into my purse for the parcel I had for them.

When D-Trio (Dean, Dickson and Dimples) came in we exchanged greetings and I made necessary introductions. I gave Dean the parcel and told them I would keep in touch. As they left, I noticed Dimples gave Jẹyọ a goodbye handshake.

Jẹyọ: I didn’t know you knew Dimples.

“He’s my very good friend’s son. Just like you and your cousins.

Jẹyọ: He’s a flirt. That’s what he is. We have some history.

“So that’s why he shook your hand. I was wondering. Dimples, Dimples,” I said, shaking my head, “ I’m praying for him.”

Jẹyọ: Don’t waste your prayer time. He’s not ready to grow up. There’s only one thing on his mind, fun.

“He’s maturing spiritually, slowly but surely. His parents are becoming firmer in helping him with his lifestyle.

Jẹyọ: A 30-year old that still needs his parents to train him in life skills. Have you heard anything so sad?

 “How long did you and Dimples date?”

She told me and I caught something on her sheet. I asked a few questions and gave her my analysis.

Jẹyọ: I didn’t notice that. Thank you.

I smiled and responded, “You’re in charge of your life goals and achievements.”

Jẹyọ: But I can’t even hear God on what I am to do with the rest of my life. This process thing is so slow.

“It only seems slow to us humans, but God is on time.” I assured her, “You’re just going through the patience hall. Keep waiting on the Lord and with time, you’ll be fully sure.

Jẹyọ: Look at Joyin, she’s just graduated yet she knows what she wants and how to get it. She was even offered a position at a ministry. I am still on a journey.

“We all are.” I responded graciously. “Let patience have her perfect work. It took me a while to know the what, the what not, the when, the when not, the where, the where not, the how, the how not, the why, the why not, the with whom, and the with whom not…

There was a knock on the door. It was Dimples. He wanted Jẹyọ to know that he was waiting to see her after our discussion.

“He will wait forever.” Jẹyọ muttered after he left.

“At least hear what he has to say.” I offered. “He may have changed.”

Jẹyọ: Auntie, a leopard cannot change his spots.

“A leopard that has met the Lord can.”

Jẹyọ: Okay. I’ll see him because you want me to. How long did it take you to know your calling, gifting and ministry? “Several years.”

Jẹyọ: Oh. There’s hope for me then. Mine has only been a year.

“Let us pray.” We held hands and prayed in the spirit and in the understanding.

Jẹyọ: Thank you auntie. She hugged me afterwards.

“You’re welcome.” I responded. “Let’s go see who’s winning the Yoruba proverb test.”

Jẹyọ: I can’t with Dimples at the door.

“Oh I forgot. I hope you can both get over the past.”

I left Jẹyọ in the conference room. Dimples got up when he saw me and went in. When I got to Joyin and Jayọ, Delaja, one of their peers was with them.

Joyin announced excitedly as I sat down. “I won. Three rounds out of five is not bad.”

“Good job.” I responded.

Jayọ: I really have to brush up my Yoruba language skills. Ọmọ tabi lana mede sọ jumilọ. [My younger one understands and speaks Yoruba language better than me].

Delaja: So what? Language is language jare. I bet you all don’t know Yoruba fun proverbs like me?

The two ladies laughed. “Let’s hear.” They stated.

Delaja: Igi gogoro magun mi loju (If I don’t want a pointed tree to prickle my eye)

Joyin: Okere latin nwo (I’ll evade it by keeping a safe distance)

Delaja: No. That’s the real one. This is the fun proverb, maa yẹ fun (I’ll just dodge).

We all laughed.

Delaja: Bişe o ba pẹni (if the work does not make one tarry)

Jayọ: Aki pẹşẹ (we do not tarry the work)

Delaja: No, that is the real one. The fun one is a ma feel fine (You enjoy yourself)

We were all amused.

Delaja: Bopẹ, boya, akololo (sooner or later, the stammerer).

Jayọ and Joyin said together “A pe baba” (Will say baba).

He responded Rara [no], it is aa dakẹ (will keep quiet).

We all giggled.

Delaja: Maalu to şere lọsilu ọba (The cow that took a pleasurable trip to England)?

When he saw that we could not answer, he continued; Kọn bifu loma babọ (Will return as corned beef).

We all roared with amusement.

Two ladies walked by us. One of them came back to our table and called my name,

Lady A: Ade, Ade, is that you?

I nodded my head but I couldn’t make out the lady.

Lady A: You probably don’t remember me. I am…

She refreshed my memory and we exchanged greetings. It was appalling to me how different she looked without make-up. She introduced me to her friend and after they left I thought about the last name of her friend… Agbayanijẹ (An adult cheated). I was sure there was an history to that name.

Delaja: That is some name o – Agbayanijẹ. I will never answer to a name like that.

“She could always change it.”

Jayọ: Like you did.

Delaja: Yes o, I changed my name.

“What was your last name?”

Delaja: Aşa.

Laughing teasingly, Jayọ replied;

"Aşa the Hawk, Apa ọmọadiẹ jẹ (Murderer of chickens).

Delaja: That’s one of the reasons why I changed it. I don’t want to respond to a name associated with violence and murder.

“I understand.” I responded sweetly.

Jayọ: I miss calling you that.

Delaja: I don't miss it.

"So what do you bear now?"

Delaja: Apata.

Joyin: The rock. That's what I'm talking about.

Jayọ: Auntie, am I right to think that Ajayi is an orukọ amutọrun wa (heavenly name)?

“By Yoruba religion standards, yes it is.”

Jayọ: Do I have to change it?

“Do you have to? No. There’s no biblical law that says you should. If you want to though, you may. There’s no biblical law that says you can’t.”

Delaja: Ajayi is a nice name. Why would you want to change that?

Jayọ: Because I am not a Yorubaist. Why should I bear their name?

Delaja: It means the child that came out with the face looking downwards, what’s Yorubaism got to do with that?

Joyin: What’s special about having the face turned downwards at birth? Which law states that the child must bear that name? Which prophet made the declaration? Who inspired the prophet?

Delaja: Well, I am not a bible school graduate. I did not think that far.

Jayọ: I’m thinking of getting a nice name like Ibukun, Surulere, AnuKristi, Oju-rereOluwa… I’ve not made up my mind yet.

Joyin: I’m changing mine when I get married. There’s no hurry.

Delaja: Well, see that’s something I’ve not really liked, women changing their name after marriage. That’s a western culture thing.

Jayọ: Is it just western culture? Many other cultures practice it.

Continued in part 2

Derbrah writes courtesy of Agape for All Ministries. Author retains copyright.

Jadesọla’s restaurant is a drama ministry of the Yoruba Christian Women (YCW), an international faith-based non-governmental, not-for-profit organization. Similarity of names and stories are coincidental. Feel free to copy for non-commercial use. Commercial use requires permission. For more information on YCW write Jesutoyin Ajikẹ-King (toyinking@yahoo.com).

Robot  # 1 | 05.08.2008 22:17

“I know, I know. Finish this proverb” Joyin said enthusiastically. “Ọm&#...Read the full article.