Sex is a three letter word that acts like a wayward child. It is the art of copulation that was intended for committed married persons. It is one of the most abused creations of God in Nigeria.

Almost everyone is having it, whenever they want it, without thinking of any consequence; from Secondary school pupils to sophisticated campus girls; Motor Park touts to politicians; university lecturers to Nollywood stars, all have tasted of this fruit and agree that it is really good to the eye, desirous for eating and good to make one wise like the original sin. Society as a whole is accommodating in teaching the art of non-restraint in sex. The female hem-lines have raced up the knee; the blouses have let out more cleavage and almost every nubile child has turned to a belly-dancer in fashion. When business men close that deal, they do not head home to the old wife, but to pick the ‘Suzy’ break the cork and ravel in forbidden fun. When politicians come to town, there is a party and freshly formed young adults are lined up for their bounteous entertainment. Per chance, the same politicians travel outside the country to London, Paris or New York, the Strip joints and ‘Gentlemen’s Clubs’ have a great boost when Nigerian money-bags are in town.

On the world statistics, Nigeria is the third most infected country with the deadly AIDS/HIV virus. Why Nigeria would be climbing in infection rates in spite of all the money and attention given to it is a question that begs for answers. We shall attempt a re-focus on what group is high risk in Nigeria.

Bigmanism

Most of the intervention plans really focus on the young and reckless for good reason. It is assumed that it is the young adults between the ages of 18-24 that are most active sexually. That may not be completely true in Nigeria where sexual license is commensurate to purchasing power. This is my postulation: The society has almost turned a blind eye on the philandering of the richer and comparatively more successful within the poverty saturated society. The society has willingly mortgaged its morals at the altar of mammon regarding acceptable sexual behavior among its “Big Men”. In Nigeria , the moneyed male has bought his right to sleep with any one willing to accept his money. Because the society is informally stratified into the oppressed and oppressor classes, the Politician is a ‘Big Man’ who is not strapped down by faithfulness to any familial trappings like marriage, he can bed any damsel he fancies and she would be grateful she knew a ‘Big Man’. Lawyers in conference in Port Harcourt were quoted as decrying the absence of “Conference Materials”, a known euphemism within the trade, for ‘one-time sexual liaisons’.  The corporate successes in Lagos , Abuja , Port Harcourt or any major Nigerian City need just step unto any campus in Nigeria and they would be approached by pimps offering the prettiest of Nigerian undergraduates for a fee. The competition got so bad, I read, that the “professionals” in some cities now have to go to the university campuses to pose as students to get patronage from higher class patrons who pay higher rates for services. What is common among these “Big Men” is their aversion for the condom. City folk also, because of purchasing power, when they visit their villages, have the power to spread their ‘wild oats’ some of which may be infected by the AIDS virus. In my theory, therefore, in Nigeria, the spread may be a top-down effect with the lecherous older [and richer] men more responsible for the spread of this phenomenon by virtue of their philandering habits.

AIDS Intervention

Acquired Immunity Deficiency Syndrome is a lifestyle disease. It first came to the fore as something that happened to ‘those other people’. It was first prominently noticed among the homosexuals; then it crept to heterosexuals and now, it is affecting every segment of society, inclusive of babies through their mothers. Nigeria cannot continue to ignore it by continuing with the same reckless lifestyles pre-AIDS. Casual sex with someone who may not even look sick may pass on this deadly disease. Because of stigma and the lack of testing, whole generations in Nigeria may be dying without being even aware of the fact that they have the ‘big disease with the little name’.

As culled from the United States President’s Emergency Plan for Aids Relief New Partners Initiative Participant CD -

QUOTE:

Defining the ABC Approach

The ABC approach employs population-specific interventions that emphasize abstinence for youth and other unmarried persons, including delay of sexual debut; mutual faithfulness and partner reduction for sexually active adults; and correct and consistent use of condoms by those whose behavior places them at risk for transmitting or becoming infected with HIV. It is important to note that ABC is not a program; it is an approach to infuse throughout prevention programs. The ABC approach is distinctive in its targeting of specific populations, the circumstances they face, and behaviors within those populations for change. This targeted approach results in a comprehensive and effective prevention strategy that helps individuals personalize risk and develop tools to avoid risky behaviors under their control.

Abstinence programs encourage unmarried individuals to abstain from sexual activity as the best and only certain way to protect themselves from exposure to HIV and other sexually transmitted infections. Abstinence until marriage programs are particularly important for young people, as approximately half of all new infections occur in the 15- to 24-year-old age group. Delaying first sexual encounter can have a significant impact on the health and well-being of adolescents and on the progress of the epidemic in communities. In many of the countries hardest hit by HIV/AIDS, sexual activity begins early and prior to marriage. Surveys show that, on average, slightly more than 40 percent of women in sub-Saharan Africa have had premarital sex before age 20; among young men, sex before marriage is even more common.  ^{A significant minority of youth experience first sex before age 15. Internationally, a number of programs have proven successful in increasing abstinence until marriage, delaying first sex, and achieving “secondary  abstinence”—returning to abstinence—among sexually experienced youth. These programs promote the following:}   

• Abstaining from sexual activity as the most effective and only certain way to avoid HIV infection;         

• The development of skills for practicing abstinence;       

• The importance of abstinence in eliminating the risk of HIV transmission among unmarried individuals;        

• The decision of unmarried individuals to delay sexual debut until marriage; and         

• The adoption of social and community norms that support delaying sex until marriage and that denounce cross-generational sex; transactional sex; and rape, incest, and other forced sexual activity.

Be faithful programs encourage individuals to practice fidelity in marriage and other sexual relationships as a critical way to reduce risk of exposure to HIV. Once a person begins to have sex, the fewer lifetime sexual partners he or she has, the lower the risk of contracting or spreading HIV or another sexually transmitted infection. Some of the most significant gains in Uganda ’s fight against HIV are a result of specific emphasis on, and funding of, programs to promote changes in behavior related to fidelity in marriage, monogamous relationships, and reducing the number of sexual partners among sexually active unmarried persons.

^{Uganda ’s President Museveni, along with local religious groups and other NGOs, promoted a consistent message of partner reduction and fidelity, which contributed to a significant decline in the number of sexual partners among both men and women in Uganda . Between 1989 and 1995 the proportion of men who reported one or more “casual” partners in the past year fell from 35 percent to 15 percent; the proportion of women with one or more casual partners in the past year fell from 16 percent to 6 percent, and the proportion of men reporting 3 or more “non-regular” partners in past year fell from 15 percent to 3 percent. This significant level of behavior change contributed to a reduction in estimated adult HIV prevalence in Uganda from 15 percent in the early 1990s to about 4 percent today.}  

• The adoption of social and community norms that denounce cross-generational sex; transactional sex; and rape, incest, and other forced sexual activity. ^{Be faithful programs promote the following:}          

• The elimination of casual sexual partnerships;       

• The development of skills for sustaining marital fidelity;

• The importance of mutual faithfulness with an uninfected partner in reducing the transmission of HIV among individuals in long-term sexual partnerships;

• HIV counseling and testing with their partner for those couples that do not know their HIV status;

• The endorsement of social and community norms supportive of refraining from sex outside of marriage, partner reduction, and marital fidelity, by using strategies that respect and respond to local cultural customs and norms; and

Correct and consistent Condom use programs support the provision of full and accurate information about correct and consistent condom use reducing, but not eliminating, the risk of HIV infection; and support access to condoms for those most at risk for transmitting or becoming infected with HIV. Behaviors that increase risk for HIV transmission include engaging in casual sexual encounters, engaging in sex in exchange for money or favors, having sex with an HIV-positive partner or one whose status is unknown, using drugs or abusing alcohol in the context of sexual interactions, and using intravenous drugs. Women, even if faithful themselves, can still be at risk of becoming infected by their spouse, regular male partner, or someone using force against them. Other high-risk persons or groups include men who have sex with men and workers who are employed away from home. Existing research demonstrates that the correct and consistent use of condoms significantly reduces, but does not eliminate, risk of HIV infection. Studies of sexually active couples for example, in which one partner is infected with HIV and the other partner is not, demonstrate that latex condoms provide approximately 80-90 percent protection, when used consistently. To achieve the protective effect of condoms, people must use them correctly and consistently, at every sexual encounter. Failure to do so diminishes the protective effect and increases the risk of acquiring a sexually transmitted infection (STI) because transmission can occur with even a single sexual encounter. Latex condoms, when used consistently and correctly, are highly effective in preventing transmission of HIV. In addition, correct and consistent use of latex condoms can reduce the risk of other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), including gonorrhea, chlamydia, and genital ulcer diseases. While the effect of condoms in preventing human papillomavirus (HPV) infection is unknown, condom use has been associated with a lower rate of cervical cancer. Persistent infection with “high-risk” types of HPV is the main risk factor for cervical cancer. Condom use programs promote the following:

• The understanding that abstaining from sexual activity is the most effective and only certain way to avoid HIV infection;     

• The understanding of how different behaviors increase risk of HIV infections;

• The importance of risk reduction and a consistent risk-reduction strategy when risk elimination is not practiced;

• The importance of correctly and consistently using condoms during every sexual encounter with partners known to be HIV-positive (discordant couples), or partners whose status is unknown;

• The critical role of HIV counseling and testing as a risk-reduction strategy;

• The development of skills for obtaining and correctly and consistently using condoms, including skills for vulnerable persons; and

• The knowledge that condoms do not protect against all STIs.

UNQUOTE.

In conclusion, why should you care? Because some kin near you may be infected, or even nearer home, the next time you cheat or have a ‘fling’, you may walk into the deadly clutches of AIDS. Persons are naturally interested in sex; as evidenced by the number of hits sex articles or nudity or partial nudity attracts. It is better for adults to be fully informed, so they, in exercising the power to decide, can make a fully informed choice based on all the facts as well as the risks. Flights of passion should not lead to flights of hell on earth with the AIDS Pandemic.

Robot  Villager

# 1 Why should you care? Because some k...Read the full article. Posted by Robot| 24.10.2006 16:25

GirlWifanAttitude  Villager

# 2 Excellent piece! Bravo, Mr. Ula-Lisa very good. It's about time a guy with guts sheds light to the AIDS problem in our environment, especially in Nigeria in NVS for all the so called "Congo Shiners" here to read and be forewarned, especially those who revel in their illicit c-shinning hobby, and write with glee about it. I say abstinence is the way to go until you're married, and its cool! Posted by GirlWifanAttitude| 24.10.2006 16:58

Abraxas  Villager

# 3 Hi, Ms. GirlWifanAttitude! Why give congo shining a bad name? And what makes you think that, after abstaining until you are married, you would not contract HIV/AIDS either from your very beloved husband, YES, YOUR HUSBAND, or from a contaminated hyperdermic needle, or from HIV-infested blood transfusion system, NOT necessarily because you were a reckless congo shining bitch, but you were simply unfortunate? I beg, jo, commot make man see climate, o'jare. Muchas gracias. Don Juan Carlos ABRAXAS (III) Posted by Abraxas| 24.10.2006 17:12

nallanah  Villager

# 4 Mr Ula-Lisa, Very well written, and timely too!! I think it's about time we all did a little soul searching, not necessarily to point fingers at one another, but to help educate each other on this dreadful scourge of our time. Don Carlos, I crave your indulgence not to take this topic lightly; you might be correct in your analysis, but I doubt if the majority of people contracting this disease did so because "their husbands gave it to them". There is a BIG problem with HIV and AIDS in Nigeria, and I think it will be prudent if we all take it seriously! Congo Shining is not in vogue anymore. Let us show a bit of responsibility in our responses. "It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness" (Old Chinese Saying) Posted by nallanah| 24.10.2006 18:54

Abraxas  Villager

# 5 Hi, my friend, Nallanah! I am very serious. What makes you think I do not mean what I've just said? HIV/AIDS is not just a SEX-centred issue. You do not need to fcuk (i.e. shine congo) in order to contract HIV/AIDS, I am sure you are very aware. So why all the subliminal force-feeding of a dangerous propaganda into the thinking of unsuspecting victims that overtly link SEX with AIDS? What stops single partner pre-marital affairs from being AIDS-free? Why must AIDS be perceived ONLY as a sexually transmitted desease? Do you ever worry about gonorrhea, herpes, or syphillis? If you care to protect yourself from any of those ancient veneral deseases, you are as good as being AIDS-proof! Why ONLY conjure the dread of AIDS whenever we want to freighten ourselves about SEX? Why? Why? Why, Oh why? The propaganda must stop! Muchas gracias. Don Juan Carlos ABRAXAS (III) Posted by Abraxas| 24.10.2006 19:12

ula-lisa  Villager

# 6 =Abraxas;135648>Hi, my friend, Nallanah! Why ONLY conjure the dread of AIDS whenever we want to freighten ourselves about SEX? Why? Why? Why, Oh why? The propaganda must stop! @ Don: You are smarter than to ask why we frighten ourselves about sex. If God says do not do it, won't you be scared to offend Him???? You know why: 1. There is as yet no known cure; you catch it, you die slowly broz. 2. It decapacitates families, then societies, esp in Africa without infrastructures, we have children fending for infants when parents taken by AIDS 3. Blood transfusion, needle exchange are other ways of contracting it, but how many people give/take blood daily. We know persons who congolize daily and with different women. In a game of probability which has more occurence? 4. Not talking about it would not eliminate the scourge, rather facing it square would. Be a man. Go test, go marry if you have not and stop congolization. Drink water from ya own cistern. Do not be greedy. A rose is a rose is a rose; ojare :rolleyes: Posted by ula-lisa| 24.10.2006 23:03

purple  Villager

# 7 Mr Ula-Lisa, Thanks for a well written piece on a very important topic. Nigerians should learn from the Eastern African countries ravaged by HIV/AIDS. Documentaries and news clips showing the devastation of families and communities in Uganda/Kenya is heart wrenching. The on going sexual revolution in Nigeria needs to be accompanied by aggressive sex health education and resources. The field day that the so called Nigerian big men are having by engaing in indiscriminate sexual activities with multiple partners is propped up by widespread deep poverty in the country. When the Nigerian youth recieves good quality education, she/he will be no longer be cannon fodder for the disease ridden Nigerian Big man. Posted by purple| 24.10.2006 23:57

Profegee  Villager

# 8 I salute the courage and resolve of the author to take the bull by the horn. Kudos to you! All well said my people. It seems to me that while all efforts are put in place by individuals, families, religious organisations, etc. to inculcate discipline or self-control in the society, the contributions of the government at all level worsen rather than help tackle the scourge. How do you describe the so-called sex education: contraceptives, condoms, etc. taught the primary and junior secondary kids. By this I don't mean the normal integrated science and usual Biology's Reproductive System. The curriculum is so structured that the teachers involved teach the innocent kids to arouse them at the early stage of their lives, thereby tempting them into experimenting what ordinarily would not have come into their minds. Still talking about our Government, will it not amaze you that the easiest means of embezzlement is through health funds. Millions of dollars are expended on ineffective campaigns which never touch lives of people. Tuberculosis, HIV/AIDS funds, polio, Guinea worm and other health related funds end up in the pockets of our leaders since most of these activities and projects end up with huge sums going into logistics and consummables. I make bold to say that they (Government officials and politicians) would never pray the epidermics leave the land. But we are the stakeholders, our future is in God's hands and also in our hands. Just like several authors have written in support of the ABC of HIV/AIDS, I think the government should not be spoiling our future for us. Just imagine things continue this way, you will soon realize that life expectancy that is hitherto very low as a result of poverty, malnutrition, frustration due to unemployment, poor medicare, etc. will be further lowered by HIV/AIDS. Besides, time would come (God forbid) when there will be no grand parents if bull is not taken by the horn. If we care to follow the trend of events in Southern Africa and India you will understand the reasons why all hands must be on deck tackling this scourge. Thinh of it, without HIV/AIDS intection how many Nigerians can afford three square meals (balanced or no balanced diet)? As we lay our beds so we lie on it. Mr. Eric Terfa Ula-Lisa, keep the flag flying. Together we shall make Nigeria HIV/AIDS free. Profegee Posted by Profegee| 25.10.2006 00:39

Uche Nworah  Villager

# 9 Pastor Eric After the harrowing experience I went through last year when I submitted a blood sample to be screened for the H.I.V virus, a condition I had to fulfil before I could marry my wife at her church (House On The Rock), I don’t think that this H.I.V/AIDS message could be ever over-preached. Rather, I still think that we are not doing enough as public commentators to highlight the dangers and consequences of our promiscuous lives. Sure I got a clean bill of health but what if the results had been negative? What would have been my fate? What type of life would I have led afterwards? Could my wife still have gone ahead to marry me? Would I still be writing on NVS? There are just too many questions which I still ask myself till today such that my own advice to brothers out there would be to ‘sheath their swords’ if they can, or like you suggested pack a condom always in their wallets for those very testing moments or emergency situations. The life you save may be yours. I recounted my ordeal in this article – Home And Dry. The dangers are ever so clear, present and imminent after recent reports in the media that Nigeria is now in the big league of countries with the highest number of H.I.V/AIDS infections. Posted by Uche Nworah| 25.10.2006 03:57

Abraxas  Villager

# 10 Hi, folks! OK, I give up. SEX = AIDS, and AIDS = SEX. (Dis won pass me, o’jare, my buroda) But then, it never ceases to intrigue me: How come the whole world had been blissfully ignorant about HIV/AIDS, until barely the past 20 years or so? Why did the world not hear about AIDS in the hedonic 1970s, and in the bohemian 1960s, or earlier? Was it because modern medical science was not sufficiently sophisticated to diagnose HIV/AIDS then? Could it be that HIV/AIDS was somehow “injected” into this planet, about a quarter of a century or so ago, sequel to accidental or deliberate scientific research activity that may have or may not have gone completely haywire, and with the African race being its predetermined target? Questions. Questions. Questions. Somebody provide me an answer! I may be wrong. I may be paranoid. If so, please, correct me with rational facts. Muchas gracias. Don Juan Carlos ABRAXAS (III) Posted by Abraxas| 25.10.2006 04:01

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