One of the most popular programs currently running on satellite TV in Africa is Idol East Africa. As is characteristic of everything African, Idol East Africa presents a detailed imitation of American idol, only that in this instance, the moderators are much more insulting of contestants. Slipping in and out of fake American accents, while desperately, but unsuccessfully striving to mask their African accents, Zimbabwean music entrepreneur Trevor TK Siyandi sits on the fence much like Randy Jackson, Botswanan rap star Scar desperately tries to present himself as the mean Simon Cowell, while Kenyan radio personality Angela Angwenyi, pretends to sympathize with the contestants just as Paula Abdul would, only she is not able to hide her disdain for the poorer looking ones among them.

As each contestant files in to perform, he is subjected to the judgmental glare of the eminent jurists, and depending on how Americanized one’s dressing and general appearance is, s/he is either met with an appreciative eye dim by the male folks, a delightful squeal of ‘you are so cute’ by Angela, or a haughty look and condescending reception by the trio. The stage is then set for either a barrage of insults or often undeserved adulation, bordering on mediocrity by the panel of adjudicators. Brothers are turned against brothers, friends set against friends, people’s confidence crushed with words so cruel that it dares not be repeated in print.

Worse still is the case of the Dar Es Salaam auditioning where majority of the contestants are more fluent in Swahili than English. The producers of the program would have expressly stated that the number one criterion for entering the competition is a perfect command of the English language, rather than forcing the contestants, whose language of formal instruction and everyday interaction happens to be in Swahili, to babble along in incomprehensible grammar mixing up their ‘l’ and ‘r’ as in ‘ploud’ for ‘proud’ or ‘cereblate’ for ‘celebrate’. At such mispronunciation, the judges often burst out in mind wrenching laughter and ‘apologizes’ to the contestant that even though s/he might have a terrific voice, s/he lacks global appeal in the form of language, which disqualifies him.  In an unsuccessful attempt towards pontification, Angela, obviously prodded by the program producers, haltingly speaks in Swahili to the now flustered contestant, conveying the sincere her regrets of the panel – from her demeanor at such moments, she would rather not  have done so if left to her discretion.

Moreover, the trend in the East African Idol is that the more skimpily dressed and ‘westernized’ a lady looks, the better her chances of getting selected by the benchmen, even with a little less than croak in the form of singing. Severally, the posh contestants are alloted more time than others in an attempt to get them get it right since they look right already. With nipples protruding through transparent shirts, navels and midriffs bared, and guys clad in what sometimes appear to be the dressing of a deranged street urchin, the contestant comically gesticulate and modulate like American artistes. The few who dare to be original by performing African songs and dances or tried a unique blend of African, Asian or European beats are almost booed by the judges and asked to go get their acts together.

Not surprisingly, the East African Idol competition presents a copy of the political, economic and social situation in Africa today; a predominance of the culture of self-deprecation and a servile worship of Europe and America. The Euro-American  hero-worship of crack addicts, men and women of shallow intellectual prowess bereft of moral values, whose only stake to fame and fortune happen to be in often cosmetically procured pretty faces and chiseled features,  is gradually becoming the rave among African youths. The very notion of making an ‘idol’ out of a mere mortal goes against the grain of African values. Africans place much emphasis on intellectual achievement, entrepreneurship and a high regard for team work. Indigenous Africa holds character building at high premium and talents without character is usually never acknowledged. Chinua Achebe displays this clearly in the Things Fall Apart with the illustration of the great flutist Unoka, Okonkwo’s father.

While there is nothing inherently wrong in borrowing a foreign platform to showcase African talents to the world, caution must be exercised to ensure that what is presented to the world is not a farcade, an inferiority complex ridden show that strives to mask the true African personality, culture and music, opting rather, to submerge itself in a Euro-American model that has failed its youths and left them suicidal, classroom shooters.

 The crisis of the Euro- American youth is rooted in the warped media image presented by the so-called Hollywood stars, but hopefully, the present generation of Africans can push back the ravages of Euro-American domination on the African mind. Globalization has de-mystified Europe and America and Africans are slowly but steadily beginning to transcend the Hollywood veneer presented as American reality to the world. From the cyber centers in Africa, youths are able to catch a glimpse of the hardships encountered by Americans who are up to their neck in debt, suffer from severe loneliness and depression owing to the loss of family bond,  and the routine marginalization and discrimination of Blacks. Sometimes, one wonders what would have been the crime situation in America, where with a much strengthened legal system, near perfectly equipped law enforcement agents, existence of DNA technology, high end crime prevention and cracking technology, heinous crimes are still committed at an alarming rate. 

Despite the ravages of wars, HIV/AIDS, hunger and malnutrition, there still is so much going on for us as Africans, one can still board public transport bus and chat heartily with his neighbor – enjoy a sense of feeling of ownership and of being where one ought to be, which is in one’s own country among his people – even the existence of ethnicism has not undermined that. What Africa needs is a re-discovery of its real and authentic self through proper education –formal and informal. The indigenous African values, beliefs and knowledge systems must be used as the foundation to develop a modern system that can hold forth as a unique global brand.

Robot  # 1 | 02.06.2008 11:25

...Read the full article.

draftman  # 2 | 02.06.2008 12:18

I agree with you sister, but let's look at our total value in africa, we do not value anything african i.e our names now is John, Mary, Godwin, etc, all european names, our forefather religion, we now condemned them, and replace with all these foreign religion, i.e xtian, Islam, etc, our clothes, we cherish our suit in this hot tropical weather, instead of our flowing light colorful attire, even our food, we rather eat from the imported can and boxes that our freshly made eba, amala, ogbono, ewedu, iyan, etc.. of course our language anyone who speak their god given father language is consider an illeterate, and speaking vanacular. We believe the european when they told thst everything about us is bad and all things about them are good. We even worship their made up god, and idol their made up book. We are bunch of zoobie, mumus, and robot. We just do as we were told, no question asked. We are bunch of lost soul. It is good for the westerners to import their value as this will open a huge market for them, they can now import their filthy film, music, and immoral style, that is why I applaud the northerners in nigeria when they reject the Miss World Pageant to be held in Nigeria. We do not proud of our self achievement, and not confidence, we are self hater.

philipikita  # 3 | 02.06.2008 23:41

Yes Draughtsman. I hated the idea of Miss World in Nigeria. If it were some so-called private money being used to sponsor, I wouldn't mind. But public money was being expended on a gathering of "broomsticks" from across the world. Agbani Darego might be beautiful in the Eurocentric sense, she is not beautiful in the African sense. CHIKA, the author of this piece, with her chubby cheeks, and nice lips, qualifies as an African beauty. Yes. she's beautiful to my eyes, because I'm African.

Agidimolaja  # 4 | 03.06.2008 00:49

Draftman, Yes,you are quite right. We are a sorry people.We love and glorify in things of our former oppressors including their languages,their cities/countries and their ways of life. Poor us!

Caeser  # 5 | 03.06.2008 01:29

Asampete nwanyi oma, you are a very pretty lady. If at any time you decide to vie for Miss world or contest for any of our numerous subsaharan idols, send me a PM and you will surely get my vote ( kindly include your 'handy' in the PM)

tanibaba  # 6 | 03.06.2008 06:07

@caeser Hope you are not trying to woo this beautiful African queen? taslim

mulan  # 7 | 03.06.2008 06:39

I often wonder if the producers of these shows do dictate the terms to the T. For instance, must the winner be 'globally' appealing. Why not an 'idol' acceptable to their goegraphic region or even to Africa. The continent has more than 500 million people I think. The disparagement of swahili accents and music styles as described in this article is distasteful. The WA idol was able to evade this pitfall because most countries in the region are English speaking. In any case, the show was dominated by the primarily anglophone Nigeria. Even then, some African music styles were incorporated along the way. However, at the end of the day, the 'global' recording contracts much touted by the producers never materialise. Funny enough the winners are back to depending on goodwill from their immediate local audience...

fxo  # 8 | 03.06.2008 07:28

Chika as much as I empathize with your mindset of the need for being dignified and full of pride in all thing African. Please do not forget as in the case of the West African idol, the producers started out to find someone with a global appeal. Between me and you, the most successful entertainers are not the most talented, but the most packaged and ready. Language Sex-appeal Vogue Global exposure And so on, are necessary to make the kind of statement the producers of this show are looking for. Africans represent less than 1/12 of the world population. A performer who will appeal to the global market has to be more than a local champion. A good example is the Serbian and Russian tennis players who all always put as much emphasis on their mastery of English in their teenage years as they put in their kits and endorsements. Ask Yousour N'dor who sings in Wolof, French and English, when does he get airtime on the global radio. That little bit about scantily cladded, well in my study of African culture, scantily cladding is African, it as African as our skin color. Unless you believe Zulus, Mores, Sothoes, Swanas, Luo, Masai, Sukuma and et al are not Africans.